Bella's Heart Song
by Carlisle's Mate
Summary: Fatally wounded by Victoria, Bella awakens as a newborn vampire. But her new senses allow her to realise that Edward is not the soulmate she thought he was, for her soul sings desperately for another Cullen entirely... Bella & Carlisle pairing. Lemons!
1. Chapter 1

_**Deep breath… okay, here goes, my very first fanfiction story! This is a Bellisle love story, rated M for forthcoming lemon, because you can't have a Bellisle story without some juicy lemon, right? ;) The story is set during Eclipse, right after the fight with Victoria's army. **_

_**I'm new to fanfic so please be kind, look forward to hearing your reviews and comments! Thank you for reading. **_

**BPOV**

Here I was, in all my glory. Reborn. Newborn. _Vampire. _

I should be happy… I should be glad. It was all I ever wanted, right? To be with _him… _to be with Edward, forever.

Ah, the bitter irony. The cruel twist of Fate that has been dealt.

I gaze around the room, unblinking. My body no longer enslaves itself to such human traits. They are all here, watching me, and not watching me. Unsure of me… but if only they knew. Knew that right now, I was as calm instinctually as a newborn vampire possibly could be. But emotionally? I was a wreck. Because no one was more unsure of me right now, than me. I was feeling things that were… well, beyond comprehension for me at this given moment.

Yet, they have no idea, as they all sit there, glancing at me.

All sitting there, except one.

_Oh Esme._

I do not want to remember, but I do, with all my new vampire clarity. It plays through my mind, over and over. Taunting me. Haunting me.

_The clearing. The battle. Victoria's newborn army. _

_It had all been going so well. Victory was almost… easy. All of the newborns had been dealt with, all except one young girl, who sat cowering to one side, having surrendered herself to Carlisle's kindness. _

_Or so we thought. _

_Edward and Seth had brought me to the clearing, after the confrontation with Victoria. She had found us, along with her poor deluded newborn, Riley. Edward had tried to reason with him, help him to see that Victoria did not love him, she was merely using him in order to wreak revenge for the death of the one she truly had loved. _

_It seemed he would not listen… but then he did. He looked at Victoria, and then at us, and with an anguished look he was suddenly gone, and Victoria was alone. As ever with the nomadic vampire, she chose to flee, Edward cursing as she evaded him, for each time she escaped, it meant another endless period of waiting… waiting… for her to strike again. _

_But unbeknown to us, she had not gone far. And neither had Riley. _

_When we reached the clearing, there were small fires burning. I tried to close out the scent and sight of burning vampire flesh. It made me shudder, even if they had been baying for my blood. We had looked across at them then, the Cullens and the wolf pack, and my heart sang, for they were all okay. Carlisle had smiled, and Esme had reached out her arms to me, beckoning us to join them. In the background, Alice was embracing Jasper, and Emmett was scooping up Rosalie in a mixture of jubilance and passion. _

_No one anticipated Riley. No one saw him coming. Not even Alice. _

_He came out of nowhere, a flash of lightning that brought death and despair. I caught one fleeting glimpse of his face, crushed that his love, Victoria, was not who he thought her to be. She had used him, because of us. She had taken his life away, because of us. Because of us, he suffered, and thus, he wanted us to suffer too. He wanted us to feel that loss. _

_He snatched up Esme and carried her off so quickly, that even the Cullens took a second to register the action. The next moments… I cannot bear to recall them in detail. I remember the howl of the wolves, the growls and then the roars of the vampires, and the rush of air as Edward snatched me up and carried me, along with his family, hot on their trail._

_I remember the confusion, the speed, the futility of it. I remember the exact place that we paused, seeking to sense where they had gone, before catching that fateful glimpse of smoke billowing up into the air to our left. All that, in a matter of minutes. Seconds, even. _

_I remember the looks on their faces. Alice, Jasper, Emmett, Rosalie. I remember the sensation of Edward's pain as if it were my own. But most of all, I remember Carlisle. The look on his face will haunt me forever. _

_I remember thinking that perhaps we were not too late. How foolish of me. Of course we were too late. _

_Riley did not live many moments more. Emmett, Jasper and Edward saw to that. _

_Even the wolves were silent, mourning, as we sat in stunned agony around the burning ash that had once been Esme. Oh, wonderful, amazing Esme._

_I didn't even have time to cry. I had not the opportunity to cry human tears for Esme._

_Because again, we were taken unawares. I wonder if she planned it this way, all along. Edward, distracted in his grief, failed to see. Failed to sense. Alice, broken, had no vision of this next moment. _

_All I remember was a flash of red hair and glowing red eyes, before a sharp pain in my neck made me scream. I waited for the burning to begin… but it did not come. I looked up, dazed, confused. Victoria was standing over me. My eyes focused on something she was holding. _

_A knife._

_She had not bitten me. She had stabbed me. She was not giving me the chance to turn into one of them, she wanted to kill me. She knew they would get to her before she had a chance to finish me, and so she inflicted a mortal wound. _

_I remember hearing Jacob cry out, turning to a snarl, and a wolf leaping over me, ripping the iron grip away from me, letting me fall back onto the grass. Edward, Jasper… and probably others, also leaping. I vaguely heard a fight. But that is all. _

_I do not remember them tearing Victoria limb from limb, I do not remember Jacob's broken body shattering against a rock where she threw him, before the others had the chance to reach her, stop her. Just as well. Better that I knew that part afterwards, when I knew Jake to have survived, alive and well. _

_I think I must have blacked out, but I drifted in and out of consciousness, in and out of reality. I heard snatches. I remember glimpses. _

_The one thing I do remember, however, is Carlisle's voice telling Edward that this was it, he had to turn me. I was dying, there was no saving me from this. Blood was gushing from my neck, the wound was deep and vicious. I felt myself slipping away._

Turn me, my love_, I silently willed him_. I will be yours forever, now.

_But he did not move. He looked at me, horrified, unable to move. I still don't know why. Not yet. _

_I was fading. The Cullens were disappearing into blackness. One last memory before I slipped into darkness was that of Carlisle, face still filled with loss for his Esme, leaning in towards me. Despite all that had happened, he still had the strength of mind to do this… to…._

_Everything went black. _

_And then everything burned. _

_When I awoke, I was amazingly calm. Everything was so… clear. I had awoken to Alice and Jasper – Alice to comfort me, and Jasper to guard me, no doubt, in case I displayed any unwanted newborn tendencies. Alice told me everything that I could not remember. _

_She told me how Carlisle had bitten me, biting and biting to get the venom into me, and sealing the bites with his tongue to trap the poison, to give me every chance at successfully changing, not dying._

_She told me how the Volturi had come, and conversed with them, disposed of the poor girl, despite her surrender, and reluctantly left me alone, to turn. I think, and they thought too, that Jane would have liked Felix to finish me off as well. But she knew she risked too much of Aro's wrath, should they do such a thing. And so, they gave their withering condolences on behalf of Esme, and left. _

_She told me how they had carried Jake back to the reservation, broken in so many places, and how Carlisle had mended him. _

_Carlisle had amazed me. Despite all that had happened, all he had lost, he still found it within himself to save two lives. _

_And then… something irreversibly life-altering happened. _

Five days have passed. We are sitting in a large room inside the Cullens' house. I had burned for three days before waking up to Alice and Jasper. The first thing I had worried about was Charlie, but they assured me he was fine. Between Billy and Edward, they had him convinced that there had been a terrible accident, which had taken Esme's life and almost claimed mine. Charlie believed me to be in a specialist hospital in some far away city, unable to be seen.

Of course, they had expected to have to drag out this story for weeks, months, even. But here I was, cool and calm as a cucumber. Jasper was dumbfounded. It was as if I had skipped the crazed newborn phase altogether.

Under normal circumstances (well, as normal as waking up a vampire gets) I would be sitting here, wondering what on earth makes me so different. But I have other, more pressing matters on my mind.

Because here I am, sitting here, with all my newfound vampire senses. Clarity of sight, sound, touch, smell, taste. But more than that. Clarity of mind, clarity of spirit, clarity of… connection.

Suddenly, everything is clear to me, seen and unseen. Connections, truths, paths, souls.

I know my own heart, and it frightens the hell out of me.

Because now I know. I know how it feels, how _I_ feel. All the pretences, all the lies, all the misguided and misunderstood feelings, are stripped bare and discarded.

The truth, the buried truth, is exposed to me.

The man I thought I loved, is not the man I am meant to be with.

My heart loves him. But my soul does not sing for him.

There is but one soul now who makes my dead heart sing. My soul… sparkle.

And it is not Edward Cullen.

I feel my breath catch in my throat, and if my heart could still beat, I know it would be pounding. I feel Jasper throw me a curious look, and I am grateful I can no longer blush.

I feel something along the lines of what feeling sick to the stomach used to feel like. I cannot believe what I am thinking, what I am feeling. What can I do? I can feel only guilt, disbelief, and despair.

For the man who makes my dead heart sing is the one man I can surely never have, for he would surely never want me… and even if he did, the consequences were not worth thinking about.

The man who makes my dead heart sing…

…_is Carlisle Cullen._


	2. Chapter 2

_**OK I was so excited to post the first chapter I forgot my disclaimer. Stephenie Meyer owns all the characters, of course, I just love to play with them. Although I sure as hell wish I owned Carlisle… ;)**_

_**No Bellisle action just yet, we're building up to that, but there are a few scenes to tease you in the meantime ;)**_

_**Thank you so much to those who have reviewed, favourited and added to your alerts already. Wow! You rock! **_

_**CHAPTER TWO**_

**BPOV**

I sat as still as stone, looking out at the forest in awe. The particular tree I was studying was a significant distance away, but I could see everything. Every tiny detail, every tiny aging part of its gnarled trunk, was visible to me. I could hear things that were probably miles away. I could hear Emmett talking to Jasper in the house. It was weird. I could only begin to imagine what it must be like for Edward or Jasper or Alice, hearing and seeing and feeling things that others felt, on top of this abject clarity.

A brief flash of blond caught my eye, and I turned my head slightly to see Carlisle disappearing into the forest. I wondered if he was going to hunt, and then realised he was walking at human speed. His head was bowed as he moved, and my heart ached. He had been doing this for the past couple of days, and I figured he was just walking around aimlessly in the trees, lost and hurting.

_In my mind's eye I was there with him in an instant, reaching out to hold him. Brushing away imaginary tears, knowing they would be in his eyes if they could be, letting my fingers linger there for too long. He looked at me, confused, but needing. I slowly, gently, massaged the sides of his face with my thumbs, and he closed his eyes. I moved in, taking advantage of this, and almost shook as I pressed my lips to his own, His eyes shot open again, shocked, but I kept on kissing him, until he surrendered and kissed me back. Our arms found their way around each other and we merged into one, shivering as a wave of electric energy passed between us and made us cling to one another even more…_

"Bella!"

The voice shattered my vision and I jumped violently, turning to see Edward looking at me with his lop-sided grin.

_Thank God he still can't read my thoughts._

I smiled. "Hey you."

He sat down beside me and put an arm around me gently. I almost laughed; he didn't need to be gentle with me anymore, but he still was. Whether it was habit, or he was simply wary of my newborn state, I wasn't sure.

He frowned slightly as he gazed at me, brushing my now perfect vampire hair behind my now perfect vampire ear. It was killing him that he still couldn't, I could tell.

"What are you thinking?" he asked, confirming my thoughts.

"Nothing, really. I was just taking in the forest… the trees. It's all so amazing," I said, honestly. After all, that's what I _had_ been thinking, before…

_Before I had one of those visions again. _

Where had they come from? I had never thought of Carlisle that way. He had been like a… a what? I would say father figure, but in honesty that wasn't how it felt. That would be too weird, given how I felt now. No, he was more like a guide, something to cling on to in the madness of this world. A focal point, the one who held us all together.

_And yet my thoughts, if I gave in to them, could tear us all apart_.

I returned to earth and saw that Edward was still frowning at me. _Shit_, I had been lost in thought for too long. I spoke to reassure him, before he could ask another question that I would have to lie to. Everyone knew I was a terrible liar.

"I'm fine, Edward. I'm just still getting used to… you know. Everything."

He smiled, and leaned in to kiss me. I kissed him back, and analysed what I was feeling. It still felt good; it still made my heart flutter, but it was different. It made me feel… happy, I guess, but not fulfilled. Almost as if this was some nice interlude, before the real show began.

_I am a terrible person._

Maybe they were right. Maybe vampires were damned. Maybe I had been cursed for my desire to become one so easily – I had what I wanted, so God, Fate, whatever, made me not want it anymore.

_Oh my God. _

I had said it. Not out loud, but in my head.

I didn't want Edward anymore.

Hating myself, I felt myself tense up as if to cry, but knew no tears would come. Edward broke away from our kiss, sensing the change in me, and mistook my reaction for something else.

"It's okay, love," he said, softly. "Take all the time you need to get used to your new form. After all, we have all the time in the world now, for you and I."

He smiled, and my heart broke. I was a monster, just like he thought he was.

But I was worse. At least he didn't want to hurt me.

"I… I think I might go inside for a while," I said, not knowing what else to say. It was harder to find excuses now, after all, I could hardly say I was tired and needed to sleep. I'm a vampire now, and vampires don't sleep.

Edward made as if to rise and come with me, but I stopped him. He looked confused, and a little hurt.

"I just need to spend some time alone," I told him gently. "It's not you. I just… need time to adjust."

He nodded, face softening, and let me go.

I passed Jasper on my way in, and smiled at him. He smiled back, but there was an odd expression on his face.

_Keep a hold of your emotions, Bella_, I thought. _You can't hide from Jasper_.

I knew I couldn't hide from Alice, either, and that was what was worrying me most right now. I had effectively made a decision in my head. While I hadn't exactly decided to leave Edward, I had come to the realisation that I didn't want to be with him. Would that cause Alice to have a vision? I shuddered at the thought. She would be so confused, and upset.

_Only been a vampire a damn week, and already I am having to mask my thoughts. _

I lingered just inside the house for a moment, out of sight of Jasper and Edward. Listening intently, I heard them strike up a conversation, which swiftly moved to me.

"She is doing so well," I heard Jasper say.

"And yet, she's distant" Edward replied. "Says she needs time to adjust."

"Strange," said Jasper, in his beautiful drawl. "She is incredibly calm. She has taken to his life like a duck to water. And yet…"

I froze.

"Yet?" Edward pressed.

"There is something beneath that calm. Like she is burying her emotion. There is… confusion, I think."

Edward must have given him a look, because he quickly added, "But I feel a lot of love from her, Edward. Don't worry about that."

_Love. _

But not for him. I moved away, not wanting to hear any more. Why, oh why, was I feeling this way?

I paced the downstairs of the house but could not settle, so I ended up going outside again, avoiding the boys. I moved out into the trees, relishing the air on my cold, cold skin.

I felt like I could breathe better out here in the open. Which was ridiculous, because I didn't even need to.

_Carlisle. _

The name reverberated inside my mind, and I cursed. Why? _Why?_ I had never thought of him that way. I had never…

_Oh, but Bella, you had. _

My mind whirled. I stood stock still, arm stretched out to steady myself against a tree.

I had repressed this; I had thought it forgotten, until now.

I closed my eyes and remembered. Remembered seeing him for the first time, meeting Doctor Cullen on the day that Tyler almost killed me, were it not for Edward.

_He had looked so perfect. So handsome. So… beautiful. Otherworldly. _

I remembered my heart leaping wildly at the sight of him, despite the pain, despite my mind frantically trying to dissect exactly what had happened, what Edward was.

I remember picturing him in my head, only for a moment, but in a passionate embrace.

Hell, how had I forgotten this?

I remembered my 18th birthday party, all dolled up in my green dress thanks to Alice. I remembered the blood, Jasper's lunge, and the shattering of glass.

I remembered being in his study, my hand resting on his waist, while he removed the shards and stitched my wounds.

I remember thinking how incredible he looked in that crisp, blue shirt that clung to his body in all the right places, how stunning his face was, framed by his perfect hair, and how beautiful his eyes were.

I remembered his hands touching me as he worked, and I shivered.

How could I have not realised? How could I have not noticed the electricity between us, the unspoken chemistry?

But then… for there to have been chemistry, he would have had to have felt the same way…

_No, that was impossible. Don't be stupid, Bella. _

But still, as I played the scene back in my mind, I couldn't help but imagine what _could_ have happened.

_Carlisle, mentioning that they were damned. _

_Me, telling him that he couldn't be damned. _

_Him, looking at me, thanking me. _

"_You've always been very… gracious… about us," he said._

_What if…_

What if I had listened to my feelings then? What if I had kissed him? Against my better judgement, I began to play the scene in my head again, differently this time.

"_How could I not be?" I hear myself say. "You are… beyond special, Carlisle."_

_He smiles. "You are special to our family too, Bella."_

"_No… I don't mean your family. I… I mean you."_

_He looks up from his stitching, butterscotch eyes boring into mine with surprise. A slight frown creases his perfect brow, as he wonders to himself what I mean by that. _

"_Carlisle, I…"_

_I cannot finish the sentence. I merely stand there, staring at him, for about half a minute. His eyes widen suddenly, and darken, and then return to normal. _

_My thoughts turn to my hand, still on his waist, and I feel it move. Feel my fingers trace their way upwards, lightly, creeping around his torso and onto his chest. _

"_Carlisle…"_

_I close my eyes. I cannot bear to see his reaction. _

"_Bella?"_

_He sounds unsure. Afraid? No. Just unsure. _

_I open my eyes. I think if he could blush, or his heart could race, both would be happening now. _

_I lean in, and press my lips to his in a sudden rush. He gasps under my passionate kiss, and I grab at his shirt, pulling him up hard against me. I move back onto the desk I was leaning against, wriggling onto it and wrapping my legs around him to pull him in with those, too. I want him as close as he possibly can be. I want to feel every part of him. _

_I feel him tense, try to pull away, and then relax. _

_He kisses me back. _

_Oh God. _

"_Bella…" he breathes. _

My eyes snap open. I am still standing, one hand against the tree. But I am shaking. With fear?

_No. With lust. Arousal. _

_I want Carlisle so much. _

I sigh, and sink to my knees, letting the mud and the twigs cake my knees, oblivious.

I want to be with Carlisle. I _have_ to be with Carlisle.

_I will leave Edward. I will be with Carlisle, even if I have to wait months… years even. _

Too late, I realised my mistake. My mind had made a decision before I could stop it.

A whirling dervish erupted behind me. Someone was coming, at unbelievable speed.

I turn for the inevitable.

"Bella!"

I look up, misery in my eyes, as I face Alice.

The look on her face is one of utter distress.

_Holy shit. What have I done? _


	3. Chapter 3

_**Okay so I had a little more time on my hands today so I have managed to get this chapter finished too! **_

_**Thank you SO much to those of you who have reviewed, your words mean a lot and I am glad you are enjoying the story so far! **_

_**CHAPTER THREE**_

**BPOV**

Oh God. What the hell was I going to say to her?

Her eyes bored into mine, and I tried to compose myself.

Wait. There was something more in her eyes, other than the dismay.

_Confusion. _

_Okay, breathe, Bella. She might not know the whole story. Yet. _

"Alice?" I questioned, hoping my voice would come out like a normal vampire voice, and not a squeak.

"Bella… I… I saw something," she stuttered. This was unlike Alice. True, her visions were subjective, but I had never seen her be so… unsure.

She looked as though she was going to cry. Not that she could, but…

"Hey, Alice, it's okay! What is it, what did you see?"

I felt awful playing the innocent, knowing full well that whatever she saw had something to do with Edward, or Carlisle. Or both. Either way, because of me.

She looked at me, her lip trembling. Never had she looked so vulnerable.

"I felt anguish, Bella. Unspeakable anguish… I'm not sure whose. But there was so much pain. And then Edward and Carlisle were fighting. Fighting! They looked at each other like they… hated one another. How can this be? Edward was pained, beyond reason. He didn't have you anymore, and I don't know why. Perhaps it had made him crazy… why else would he attack Carlisle?"

She buried her head in her hands.

"Oh Bella, I'm so confused right now!"

I stepped forward and took her in a sisterly embrace, hugging her close.

"You're not going to leave us, are you?" she whispered into my sweater.

"Of course not!" I exclaimed. Thank God she had asked that, at least I could tell the truth.

"Then why did I see this?" she mumbled, half to herself.

"Shhh, it's okay, Alice," I whispered, hating myself even more. This was why I had to do something about my feelings. I had to stop them, somehow. Otherwise, I risked destroying the entire Cullen family completely.

But despite my thoughts, my soul raged against me.

_No,_ it seemed to cry. _You belong with Carlisle! He is the one your heart sings for. _

And suddenly, I knew I could never fight this. It was destined.

And then, I was very, very afraid.

**APOV**

Walking through the house, I felt a fresh wave of grief engulf me. I missed Esme so much, and she was everywhere, literally everywhere, in this house. I didn't know how the others could stand it. How Carlisle could stand it… but then, I guess that was why he kept leaving the house to wander the forest instead.

I wanted so much to help him, but for once I didn't know what to say. My poor Jasper couldn't bear to be near him, the emotion was just too awful for him to cope with. The same went for Edward… he couldn't bear the thoughts running through his mind. Thank goodness for Rosalie. Somehow she had steeled herself to get beyond her own sorrow and act as Carlisle's rock. But even she felt him slipping away from us. That is what she had told me this morning. I wished desperately for a vision that would tell me everything would be okay, but I saw nothing. I hadn't seen a damn thing all week.

I sighed, and slipped out into the breeze. My darling Jasper was sitting with Edward; they were discussing Bella. I heard him say that she was confused beneath the calm, and I wondered why. Perhaps it was due to Edward not being able to change her. They still hadn't talked about that yet.

Edward suddenly noticed my presence, and beckoned me over. Jasper turned and smiled, taking my hand.

"Are you alright, sweetheart?" he asked, putting his other arm around my shoulders lovingly. "You feel… worn."

I gazed up at him with a comforting smile. "I'm okay, Jazz, just… sad. And worried, about Carlisle."

"Still no visions?" Edward asked, giving my arm a comforting squeeze. I shook my head sadly.

Jasper looked over my head, and I turned to see Emmett slink out of the house. Poor Emmett. His usual boisterous self had vanished entirely, surrendered to his sadness at losing Esme. Emmett lived life through laughter and jokes, and for once, this was entirely inappropriate. He was at a loss as to how to act, I think.

I drifted away from the boys, letting them have their boy talk. I gazed at nothing in particular, wondering for a moment where Bella was, and then thinking of nothing again. Time passed, and I was wholly unaware of it.

Then the vision hit me, so hard and fast it almost knocked me out. I gasped, falling into my trance. I saw a brief flash of Jasper jumping up and heading for me, and then he was gone. I saw only what my gift wanted me to See.

_Hurt, grief, pain. From who… Carlisle? No, this was not his pain. It was different. Deeper. More raw, more angry, full of despair… oh, make it stop! It was unbearable. _

_A broken Cullen crest flashed before me, and then I heard screams. Bella? Not sure. It was over too quickly. _

_Edward. Oh God! What has happened to Edward? His eyes, full of rage and fury, pain and… something else. _

_I saw him alone, pounding the trees with his fury, whispering something… _

_Bella. Bella. Why did you do this? Why did you go… _

_He said something more, but it was inaudible. _

_Then, he was inside the house. Something crashed to the floor, shattering. Something else, smashing into a bookcase._

_Hell, it was Carlisle! _

_He lay where Edward had flung him, eyes blazing. Edward roared, preparing to leap in for… what, the kill? NO! Edward stop! _

_So much hatred, so much despair…_

"Alice! ALICE!"

I was shaken from the horror, my vision blurring as I gradually became aware of Jasper shaking me violently. Shouting at me. Loud.

"Alice!"

I focused on him, and he knew I was back. His voice softened.

"Geez Alice, what did you see? You were screaming the place down. I should think they heard you right throughout Forks!"

"Pain," I whispered. "Bad."

Before he could reply, my eyes widened.

"I have to find Bella," I said, and in an instant, I was gone.

**BPOV**

Alice had calmed down after I reassured her several times over that I was not planning on leaving them. I kept hoping and praying that she wouldn't specifically ask me if I was planning on leaving Edward, because I knew what an appalling liar I was.

I think she was going to ask, but mercifully we reached the house before she had the chance. Jasper came running over, worry creasing his brow.

"Everything okay?" he asked, warily. Alice nodded.

"I think so. I'm not sure what my vision meant… it doesn't make sense."

She took hold of Jasper's hand and led him inside. Emmett followed like a lost puppy, leaving me with Edward.

I wondered if he knew. He always read Alice's mind when she had a vision. Had he seen himself fighting Carlisle, hating him?

He answered my question with one of his own.

"What was all that about?" he asked.

"Didn't you see?" I murmured.

"No. Alice was beside herself, screaming her head off. I tried to read what she saw, but she was so distressed it hurt my head just to try. Did she tell you what it was, the vision?"

"Kind of… I think she wants to keep it to herself, for now," I lied, hoping that he wouldn't see through me. Thankfully, he was too rattled to pay much attention to the way I spoke.

"Bella…"

"Yes Edward?"

"Jasper mentioned that you felt… confused. Is there something you want to… talk about?"

I knew immediately what he was alluding to. The fact that he had not been able to turn me himself.

The old me would have wanted answers to this right away. But not the new me. Not the me who stood here, betraying him with my every thought.

I still wanted to know, simply out of curiosity. But not now. I had enough to process already.

I looked up at Edward, and shook my head.

"No, I'm fine."

He frowned, trying to read me, and pulled me close.

"I love you, Bella," he whispered, breathing in the scent of my hair.

"I love you too," I replied automatically, hating myself.

He pulled me into a tight embrace, and we stayed like that for a while. I let my eyes drift across the trees in the background, trying to distance myself from this horrific situation.

But that didn't help, because Carlisle chose that particular moment to come back from his walk.

I tried not to tense in Edward's arms as I caught sight of him. He looked beautiful, even in his forlorn and dishevelled state.

He looked up and saw us, and I lowered my head, half burying my face in Edward's shoulder, so he wouldn't see me staring. I could just see him still, and he looked so sad. He was gazing at us, torn between happiness for those who were dear to him, and sadness for not having that closeness for himself anymore.

I raised my head a little, despite warning myself not to. I felt like stars were dancing in my head as I looked at him, and was reminded of Jacob's story of imprinting in the pack.

Carlisle looked directly at me then, and our eyes locked.

_Shit, I couldn't look away now, it would seem rude. _

He frowned slightly. I wondered what he saw in my eyes. I had no idea what I was conveying at that moment.

I felt myself smile. He managed to smiled back.

Then, I'm not sure what, but I think he saw something strange in the way I was clinging on to Edward. Like I wasn't really happy with the idea of being in his embrace, or something. At least, that is what I presume he saw, because that is what I felt.

His expression changed, and he looked… odd. He was weighing us up, seeing that something wasn't right. Then, his face changed again. His eyes darkened, and the sadness left his face for a moment as he looked intently at me. I felt for a second as though our souls were silently connecting through our eyes. There was something new in his, something resembling fire. It almost seemed as though…

_No, surely not? _

His eyes widened, and he looked… shocked?

Then, he was back to his previous expression, as if nothing had happened. The smile was gone from his lips, and he looked down. Recovering himself, he turned and vanished into the house at vampire speed.

Edward felt me tense, and broke our embrace, trailing a thumb down my cheek. I was miles away, mind reeling.

"Bella," he sighed happily, and kissed me. To my relief, he broke away quickly and told me he wanted to go and check on Emmett.

"I won't be long," he promised, but I wished he would be.

He left me standing out there alone, slightly shell-shocked. What had been going through Carlisle's mind?

There was only one thing whirling through my head right now. Carlisle had felt what I felt, even if only for a second. What strange force was this, pulling us together? The only thing I could think of was to compare it to imprinting.

_No, that was stupid, Bella. Only wolves do that. _

And yet, what else did I have to go on? It might not be the same thing, but it sure as hell seemed close.

I turned on my heel and raced into the house, seeking a telephone.

I had to see Jacob, and I had to see him now.

_**Hope you liked! More reviews please, and feel free to share your theories on the plot! Looking forward to some Bella and Carlisle love? Then say pretty please! ;) **_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Okay, I was going to get straight to the Bella/Jacob scene, but I figured it was about time we got to have some Carlisle time, so you finally get to hear from him in this chapter! This is just a short interlude, but hang on in there; you will get both Bella and Carlisle in Chapter Six! **_

_**CHAPTER FOUR**_

**CPOV**

I had been thinking about everything and nothing in the woods. Thinking about things made me feel awful, but thinking about nothing was worse. It was so… empty. And then she would be there anyway, in my head, breaking me.

_Esme. _

Why did I let her go with us? Why couldn't I have stopped this?

_I was such a failure. Esme needed me, and I failed her_.

All those years… all those lonely years and then Esme making them worthwhile again. Bringing me love, bringing me happiness.

_Gone. In an instant. _

Where did I go from here?

I had paced and paced and ended up back at the house. And then, oh God help me, things became even more complicated.

Now in my study, I buried my head in my hands for the umpteenth time that day, trying not to lose control. Too much of this room had already been destroyed thanks to my spiral into this black hole.

_I had seen them almost immediately, in a tight embrace. I wanted to look away, longing for Esme to hold, but at the same time, some small part of me soared, because I had saved Bella; poor, lovely Bella, who no doubt blamed herself for all of this as usual; and at the same time saved Edward, granting him that eternal love that I had believed I would always have with Esme. _

_I had caught Bella's eye. She smiled, uncertainty on her face. Despite my pain, I forced a smile back. I did not want her to think that I blamed her in any way for this. _

_For some reason, my eyes fell to their embrace, and a slight frown crept across my face as I took in the awkwardness of it. They did not look as comfortable as they usually did – always they looked as though they were made for each other, fitting together like two halves of one whole. But now… now Bella was holding back. She seemed reluctant, as if suddenly repelled from holding Edward too near. _

_She seemed to register my change in expression, because her eyes seemed to fill with a sudden guilt. _

_What the hell? _

_And then, as I locked into her eyes even more, trying to read them, I felt the strangest sensation. I almost felt… light-headed, as if I was going to pass out. What in the world…? _

_She looked at me, and I at her, and some strange current passed through me, which had I been human would have caused me to shiver involuntarily. To my astonishment, I was sure my eyes were darkening, as a thirst, a need, rushed through me. It was not a need for blood, it was something more... _

_For a single moment, I forgot about Esme, and the pain, and the grief, and I was whole again. Heat seemed to flare in my cold, bloodless veins._

_Then, it was gone. _

_I recovered myself quickly. The pain returned with a dull thud, washing over me from head to toe. Suddenly guilt-ridden, though I knew not why, I turned and fled into the house. _

It had been different ever since.

Now, when I thought of Esme, the pain was there, but it was further away. It hurt less. Esme seemed distant, like she had been gone years instead of days.

This brought a whole fresh layer of pain. What was wrong with me? Why wasn't I feeling the same loss over my beloved wife?

Over that layer of pain, there was a layer of something else entirely. It was complex, and heavy in my soul. There was guilt interwoven with shame, horror all tied up with hope, giddy rushes of joy being suppressed by a mountain of reason.

I did not know what to do with myself, let alone think of myself.

For one moment, standing there outside the house, I had forgotten Esme entirely. I had had forgotten my family, forgotten my pain, forgotten Edward.

For one moment, I had but one thing in my universe. My soul had sung, hell, even my dead heart had seemingly sprung to life as though beating again.

For one, solitary, life-shattering moment, I had stood there, and I had wanted but one thing.

I had wanted what I could never have, something that was not mine to want.

_I had wanted Bella Swan. _


	5. Chapter 5

_**This chapter is a little longer than the others, because Alice decided she wanted to elbow her way in as well ;)**_

_**CHAPTER FIVE**_

**BPOV**

I wasn't supposed to leave the Cullen household, I knew that. Newborn risks and all that. But I had to see Jacob.

The others were too preoccupied with losing Esme and either trying to help or avoid Carlisle. In fact, even if I hadn't wanted to see Jake, I think I would have snuck out anyway. I couldn't stand the way the whole house had changed. It had lost its heart.

I rolled my eyes at the irony of that statement – a house full of vampires with a heart? Then I sighed.

This wasn't how I had wanted it to be. The change, that is. I had imagined racing through the trees at impossible speed, jumping and leaping, hunting mountain lions with Edward. Eagerly making our way to the place where Edward had first revealed his true self to me, so that I too could see myself sparkle. Going to the meadow, and finally… being able to.

I frowned, biting my lip absent-mindedly. I realised that Edward hadn't even attempted to mention progressing our relationship. His talk of marriage…my talk of... _sex_… I had been so preoccupied with my new thoughts and feelings that I hadn't really considered this fact, and had been grateful for his lack of attention, because it bought me more time before I had to either lie, or cause merry hell.

But now, it seemed odd. Why was he distancing himself from me? Was it because of what happened when I lay dying?

_Maybe. But something niggled at me, and I suspected there was more to it than that. _

I walked out of the house, and cursed.

_Sunshine. It always bloody rains in Forks, but not on the day I need it to. Typical! _

I looked down at my hands, and gasped. They looked like a thousand diamonds had been embedded in my flesh.

"Beautiful, isn't it."

I whirled, and smiled.

"Sure is, Jasper. Do you ever get used to it?"

"Oh sure, after a hundred years or so," he teased. Then his face became serious.

"I know you think you're safe, Bella, but I really think it would be better if Jacob came here."

"How did you…"

"Jacob was badly injured protecting you. We all knew it would only be a matter of time before you wanted to go see him."

"Yeah, well. I called him. Five times. No one answers. I can't wait, Jasper, I have to see him now."

"He's okay, Bella, Carlisle fixed him up good."

"That's not why I have to see him," I snapped, before I could stop myself. Jasper frowned, and I knew he was testing the air, sensing my feelings.

"What's wrong?" he asked softly. "There is something… odd, between you and Edward. I can't put my finger on it."

He looked frustrated, and I sighed. "I am fine, Jasper. Just, please, let me go. I will only keep trying. Don't give your family more grief over me. I won't let anyone but Jacob see me. Only the pack will know I'm there."

"That's the other thing I'm worried about," Jasper muttered. "Be careful, Bella."

The sun vanished, as clouds rolled overhead. _Perfect. A sign, and a little luck, for once._

"I will. Thanks."

I shot off at ridiculous speed, and didn't look back to see if he was following me.

**APOV**

The house was so quiet.

I hated this, the silence, the avoidance. I hated that Esme was still everywhere, and everyone else was nowhere.

Rosalie had dragged Emmett off somewhere to take his mind off things. She was sick of him trailing around like a lost puppy. They were probably breaking a house somewhere but I couldn't be bothered to see.

Jasper had suddenly shot off looking for Bella. I had a brief glimpse into her future and saw nothing, so guessed she had finally decided to go see the dog.

Edward was acting a little strangely. I know that with Esme's loss, no one was acting normally. Everyone was grieving. But I had expected him to be spending more time with Bella. I wished for a moment I could swap gifts with him, and see into his mind, because I didn't dare look into his future. I couldn't handle that pain again, not yet.

I heard a door creak, distracting me from my thoughts. There was movement in the house.

_Carlisle._

He had been locked away in his study ever since returning from the woods. I rose and crept through the house, cat-like, until I found him standing at a window, gazing at the rain that had just started to fall.

Whether he was aware of me or not, he did not acknowledge me. His head tilted to the side, looking at nothing in particular. Now I could see his face.

He looked angry with himself, and confused. Cautiously, I tried to find a vision for him.

I quirked my lip in surprise, and tried again. And again. And again.

_Each time, I saw him with Bella. Holding one another, in the rain. Comforting? I felt glad for that. Finally, perhaps someone could reach him. Of course it would be Bella. She had her own guilt that she needed to deal with. _

_I study their faces on the fourth time I see the vision._

_Yes, comfort. Comfort and… no, wait. No… I am mistaken, surely? Comfort. Yes. _

I slip from the room and leave Carlisle to his thoughts. I hope that Bella talks to him soon.

Something niggles at me. Something that screams a warning, that there was indeed something else in that embrace.

I try to shrug it off, but can't. My earlier vision of rage and anguish flashes through me, and I close my eyes.

_Please let it be comfort. Please…_

**BPOV**

I arrived at the reservation in what seemed like seconds. Maybe it was. Time seemed to move in a different way at vampire speed, so it was hard to tell.

The rain was hammering down now, so I flashed across the area, seeking out Jacob. I latched onto him straight away, and wrinkled my nose in disgust.

"Oh, God! Now I know what Edward and Alice mean. Wet dog… gross!"

I burst into one of the houses, knowing Jacob was in there, alone. He whirled in shock, before his face moved through a whirlwind of emotions.

Smiling, happy, to see me. Then realising that I was not me. Wanting me to be alive, but not wanting me to be this. Alive, but not alive, in the living and breathing sense.

_Please, please still want me. Please still be my friend. _

"Hey Bells," he said, finally, still staring at me.

"You stink, Jacob Black," I replied, and he smirked.

"Don't smell so good yourself."

The smirk soon left his lips, though. He went back to staring, before finally looking down, hurt in his eyes.

"So, you finally got what you wanted."

"Don't say it like that, Jake. I didn't want it quite like this, and you know it."

He looked at me again. "I know… I just… I can't believe you're one of them. It hurts, Bells."

"Would you rather I was dead, then?"

"No! Of course not. I just…"

He left the sentence hanging, and gave up.

Seemingly wrestling with himself internally as to what to say next, he finally chose his words, and carried on.

"Well. Wow. You look… incredible."

To be honest, I hadn't really studied my new self yet. I had seen glimpses in mirrors, seen my face in the bathroom in the mornings, and I knew that I looked different. Not just because of the eyes. I had taken on their otherworldly beauty, their ethereality that made them stand out so. I think I had purposefully ignored it, turned a blind eye, because I couldn't quite equate myself with that yet.

I shrugged. "It's just me, Jake."

"Yeah, but with a little added… sparkle," he teased. 'Can't wait to see _that_."

I smiled, and reached out for a hug.

"What about you? Are you alright?" I asked. I felt him nod as he tentatively embraced me, letting out an "ew" sound as he got a full whiff of vampire stink.

"No offence Bells but I might have to hold out on the hugs for a while," he said, pulling away with a strained expression. "Oh, and yeah, I'm fine by the way. Thanks to Doctor Fang, my bones all set back the way they were supposed to."

The gratitude came extremely grudgingly, I could tell, but I said nothing, because the mention of Carlisle ignited something in me, and I felt euphoric for a moment, swept away.

It also reminded me of why I was there. Other than to check on how Jake was, of course.

But I couldn't just bring up the subject, so I stalled for a bit. After checking no wolves were going to run me out of the res for being on their land, I sat with Jacob a while, talking about everything and nothing. The battle, Victoria, the pack, me. And, eventually, inevitably, us.

"I still love you, Bells," Jake said softly, after a moment or two of silence had passed. "And I know now that it's no use. You're one of them, now. There can be no us. You're his."

_Why is my love life so damn complicated?_

"I'm sorry, Jake. But I've always known that this would happen, one day. I feel like I belong to their family. I always have."

"So what happens now with Charlie? Now that… _Edward_… had turned you?"

_Of course. He was injured. He didn't see. _

I should have ignored the inaccuracy, and answered his question, but something made me blurt it out regardless.

"Edward didn't change me."

Jacob's head shot up. "What? Then who?"

"Edward… couldn't. I'm not sure why," I said hurriedly, wanting to skip over that part. "Carlisle changed me. To save my life, for Edward."

"No shit. Always knew that filthy leech was a coward," Jacob muttered to himself. I said nothing in response, and he looked at me, a little curiously.

"Guess Carlisle was quite the hero," he added, not entirely sarcastically. "Sorry about… you know. His wife."

I swallowed, and nodded.

The subject of Charlie temporarily forgotten, Jacob went back the topic of the battle. I tuned in and out, wondering how I could casually drop in the subject of imprinting.

Jacob said something insulting about Edward again, and I looked at him wearily, but again I said nothing. He looked at me like I had two heads.

"What?"

"Nothing… Bella?"

"Yeah?"

"Everything okay?"

"Uhuh."

_If you can call being in love with a recently widowed man who is the adoptive father of the guy I'm supposed to be spending eternity with okay, then yeah, I'm doing peachy._

_Shit, did I just say "in love"? _

He gave me another funny look, and I changed the subject hurriedly.

"So how are Quil and Embry?" I asked. "And Seth, and Leah?"

"Yeah, they're good. Still on a high from whipping some vampire ass, I'd say. Especially Seth."

I smiled. Sweet Seth.

"So… Quil still taking care of Claire?" I said, finally seeing an opportunity to bring the whole imprinting thing up.

"Uh, yeah, why?"

Jacob was really looking at me funny now. I ignored him and stumbled on.

"So is it just… werewolves who imprint? Or can other… species… imprint too?"

Jacob raised an eyebrow. "It's a wolf thing," he responded. "Imprinting happens in shapeshifters, I told you that, Bells."

"Remind me what it's like, again, Jake?" I asked, almost pleadingly. _Carlisle is in my head, stroking my cheek, holding me…_

"It's like… gravity moves… suddenly. It's not the earth holding you here anymore, she does. You become whatever she needs you to be, whether that's a protector, or a lover, or a friend."

"But this happens as soon as you first see that person, right?" I replied. He nodded.

_So that's not what this is, not exactly. But it feels so similar. It's like… it's like I've spun completely out of Edward's orbit and been pulled into Carlisle's. And now that I'm there, I don't ever want to leave…_

"Bella?"

"Yes?"

"Why the hell are you asking me this?"

"No reason, just, curious…"

"Has something… happened?"

He looked almost excited at this prospect.

"No, of course not."

I bit my bottom lip.

"You might be a vampire now, Bella, but you're still a crap liar," Jake snorted. "Twice I've insulted your bloodsucker and you haven't said a thing. You always defend him. Always!"

I looked at him nervously, and was horrified to see hope in his eyes, despite the fact that he just renounced all previous attempts to claim me less than an hour ago.

"Bella!" he breathed. "Something has happened, hasn't it? You don't feel the same for Edward anymore? I can tell! Dammit, Bella, say it!"

"No!" I shouted, a little louder than I intended.

"_Say it_ Bella! Say you love _me_!"

I turned away, knowing my heart would be pounding if it could.

Jake grabbed my shoulders, forcing me to look at him. Despite my vampire strength, I didn't fight him.

"Look at me, Bella! You don't love him anymore, do you?"

I closed my eyes, and despite myself, I felt my head give a very small shake. Jake tensed, almost quivering with anticipation.

_Oh God, why do I have to break his heart again? Why did I come here? I am a terrible person…_

"Bella…"

I knew I had to do something, or else he would kiss me there and then. I stepped back, eyes open again, pleading.

"Please Jake… no. I… I don't feel the same for Edward anymore. I feel for someone else. But it's not… it's not… you."

Darkness crept over Jacob's face, slowly. I braced myself.

"_Who?"_

"I can't tell you. I can't even admit it to myself."

"One of them?"

Silence.

"_One of them?"_

"Yes."

"Do they feel the same?"

"No. They don't know. I don't… know."

"So what, you're gonna steal one of them away from their partners? You're sick, Bella."

"I'm not stealing anything! There's no one to steal from anymore!" I retorted before I could stop myself. I really had to get a grip on this vampire rage.

_Shit, when did I get so callous? Esme barely in her grave, and I think that makes it okay? Jake is right. I am sick… _

Realisation dawned on Jacob faster than I hoped it would.

"The DOC? You're in love with the _DOC_?" Jacob roared, furious now. I almost back away, before remembering that I could physically hurt him just as bad as he could hurt me now.

"Shit, Bella. You are seriously screwed up," Jake spat. "Get out of here before I do something I'll regret."

"Jake! I…"

"Just GO, Bella."

Miserable to the core, I slunk out of the house, and lost myself in the flash of speed that carried me towards home.

When I found myself in the trees, I lost myself a little further, and let the thirst carry me. I caught the scent of a deer, and I lost myself to the hunt.

**APOV**

_The vision creeps over me more subtly than usual. There is joy. So much joy! I can see Bella behind a tree, caressing Edward. They feel so… happy! _

I opened my eyes and smiled. Such a relief! I honestly thought than Bella was drifting away from Edward for a while there. I went to move, but the vision stuck me again suddenly, slamming me back into my seat.

_My point of view shifts, and I can see further around the tree now. I can see Bella's hands moving up a blue shirt. There is such love in her eyes. _

_The vision shifts further. I look eagerly to see the same love I know will be in Edward's eyes._

_No! Oh God…_

_The vampire that Bella is gazing at adoringly… _

_It's not Edward. _

**BPOV**

I made my way back to the house, sated; my inner turmoil had temporarily quietened with the outcome of the hunt. _For now._

Something vibrated in my back pocket, causing me to jump. I remembered that Alice had given me a new cell phone, so that she could contact me when she needed to. I pulled it out of my pocket and saw "new message" on the screen.

Something told me I didn't want to read whatever this text contained. I sighed, and pressed the button.

_**BELLA, WE NEED TO TALK. NOW.**_

The text was from Alice. A chill swept through me, despite my already ice-cold body.

_She knew. _


	6. Chapter 6

_**Okay, here we go… Bella and Carlisle together at last! You'll have to wait a teensy bit longer for some lemon though ;)**_

_**CHAPTER SIX**_

**BPOV**

Time seemed to freeze altogether, as did I. I stood there, clutching the phone and wondering whether Alice was going to materialise out of nowhere again like last time. She didn't.

I couldn't face her, not yet. I couldn't admit to feelings I didn't even understand myself, not again. Not after Jacob's reaction.

_Not that I had expected any different. Not that I had meant to tell him at all. _

That meant I couldn't go back to the Cullen house just yet. I looked back at the trees, and debated whether to hunt again. Despite feeding well, I felt thirsty again already.

"Bella?"

If I had felt frozen to the spot before, it was nothing compared to now. Slowly, fearfully, I turned my head.

"Carlisle," I said, trying not to let my voice shake.

He looked at me for a moment, as if weighing up my state of mind. I think I might have been shaking, but I couldn't feel anything, so I couldn't tell. I could see stars, though. Beautiful, beautiful stars.

"Are you thirsty, Bella?" he asked, gently. Happy just to have an excuse for my strange demeanour, I nodded quickly. He held out his hand.

"Come, hunt with me," he said, kindly.

_God damn you man, why do you put everyone else above yourself?_

I felt myself move forward and slip my fingers into his. He looked at our intertwined hands for a moment, as if confused. Then he was Carlisle again, strong and kind and focused. His eyes were dark, ready for the hunt, and as a slight breeze ruffled his gorgeous hair, he looked to me like an awe-inspiring angel.

He pulled me into the woods, and gradually we picked up speed, until we were hurtling through the air, the scent of animal in our senses.

We ran for what must have been miles, chancing upon a pair of mountain lions and tackling them swiftly.

After drinking them both dry, we found ourselves perched on a rock. Carlisle was spread out in a casual stance, smiling to himself, wiping away the blood from his mouth.

"You're incredible," he said.

_Really?_

"Your resolve as a newborn is unheard of. So focused. So controlled!"

_Oh. _

I tried to hide my disappointment that he only meant it in that sense. I needn't have worried; he was too busy staring into space.

I steadied myself, knowing there was so much I wanted to say to him. But I had to cast that aside, and say the things that were more important right now.

"Carlisle?" I said in a small voice. He looked at me, eyes crinkled.

"I'm so sorry…"

If I could have cried then, I would have broken into huge, heaving sobs. But I couldn't, so I just heaved and managed something along the lines of hyperventilating instead. Carlisle was at my side in an instant, comforting me.

_Great going, Bella. You can't even offer someone comfort without turning it around the wrong way. _

"You have nothing to be sorry for, Isabella," he whispered, and I could feel his breath on my skin.

_Oh. My. God. _

It was like pure torture, having him that close. And the way he said my name! Normally I'd have anyone's head off for calling me by my full name. But not him.

"Yes, yes I do," I spluttered. "Your family has had nothing but trouble since I walked into it. It's all my fault, the fight was because of me. Es…"

I could hardly bring myself to say her name.

"Esme is dead because of that fight. Because of me."

"Esme loved you," he said fiercely, despite a well of grief threatening to overwhelm him at the mention of her name. "She would have gladly died for you, as any of us would. We protect our family. It's what we do."

_Esme loved me. Hell, that made me feel even worse. I couldn't betray her, I just couldn't. _

"I never wanted anyone to die for me," I whispered sadly. "I'm not worth it."

His fingers jerked my chin up hard, making me gasp.

"Don't you EVER think that," he hissed, vehemently. "You are worth so much, Isabella Swan."

I gazed helplessly at him, and he gazed back, fierce and true.

Then he looked away, remembering himself.

"Carlisle?" I whispered, still miserable. He looked back.

"Grieve for her," I said. _Crap, where did that come from?_

"What?" he asked stupidly, as if this was the talk he knew would be coming from Alice or Jasper, but never from me.

"Grieve for Esme. You sit, and you walk, and you wander, and next you will undoubtedly throw yourself into your work. But you have to grieve. You have to let the pain have you, for a while at least. It's the only way to let go, and move on."

_Jesus Christ, since when did I say profound things like that?_

Carlisle seemed to think the same thing, for a second, because he just gaped at me. Then he clenched his jaw, and turned on his heel, and stalked away.

_Shit! _

I ran after him, oblivious to the rain that was starting to fall again.

"Carlisle. Carlisle!"

I caught up to him in a small clearing, his back turned to me. His head was in one hand. I slowly made my way around him, cautiously. He was massaging his brow.

"How can I?" he asked. I wasn't sure if he was talking to me, himself, or the air. Possibly the air.

"How can I let her go? I was all alone until her. Sure. I had Edward. But I was still alone. I had no mate. No love. No one to hold me."

He was so vulnerable in that moment that I wanted to run and hold him and never let go. So, in a very small but very brave voice, I said,

"Let me hold you, Carlisle."

Gingerly, I moved towards him and slipped my arms under his and around his back, sliding my hands upwards to grasp his shirt.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Carlisle…"

Little by little, his fight ebbed away, and he surrendered into my embrace. His arms found their way around me too, limp at first, but slowly growing firmer, until we were clasped together tightly, unbreakable in that moment.

The rain fell, representing the tears we could not cry. He buried his face in my shoulder, and we stood there for what seemed like an eternity. I would gladly have stood there until the end of time, if only to give him some small shred of comfort.

Eventually, he loosened his grip, and brought his head up once again.

"Thank you Bella," he sighed. "Once again you have proven yourself to be quite an incredible young woman."

_So calm. So collected. So controlled. So… so damn Carlisle. _

He went to move away.

_No. No, that can't be it, I want so much more…_

I pulled him back to me again, catching him off guard, and squashed my face into his chest, squeezing my eyes shut.

_Just a little bit longer. Just a little bit longer to remember your feel, your scent, your touch…_

He wrapped his arms around me again, and sighed. I smiled.

When we pulled apart again, he looked down at me, and I swear his eyes were shining.

"Let's go home," he said softly, and with a smile that beckoned me to follow, he shot off into the trees.

Alice was waiting for me when we got back. So was Edward. For a moment I felt sick… surely she hadn't said anything?

But no. Edward was smiling. Alice looked like she was going to go pop, but she was plainly reciting something extremely boring in her head, because despite Edward's smile he kept glancing at her in annoyance, clearly wanting to know what she was hiding.

Edward rushed forwards and grabbed me, lifting me off the ground. I squealed in surprise as he spun me around.

"Missed you," he grinned. I caught a glimpse of Carlisle as I spun. He looked… pained. And then it was gone. He was Carlisle again, smiling for us.

Alice seemed to have caught the change in his expression, because she was glowering at him silently. He noticed, and looked down, moving away quickly into the house.

Edward frowned.

"Why is everyone reciting books today?" he asked suspiciously. "Is there something I need to know?"

"No, Edward," Alice replied quickly. "We just want some private grieving time, that's all."

Edward looked hurt. "You only had to ask," he said.

_So Carlisle was hiding his thoughts, too? I wondered if they were of me. I hardly dared to hope. _

"Bella, I need to talk to you for a minute," Alice continued.

"Can't it wait?" Edward growled, irritated. "Everyone keeps whisking Bella away from me."

Oh, so _now _he wants to spend time with me. Great.

"It won't take long," she snapped.

"Fine. I need to hunt, anyway. Seeing as you already have…"

He traced my jaw line, looking a little put out that I had gone hunting with Carlisle instead of him.

"See you later," I said, forcing a smile.

Alice grabbed my hand and yanked me into the house. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Jasper follow us in. _Oh boy, this was going to be good. Not._

"Alice…" I began, when we were out of earshot of the others, and Edward had vanished into the trees. She didn't let me finish.

"Would you mind telling me why I had a vision of you in the woods? Kissing, caressing, lost in the most incredible joy and passion… with _Carlisle_?"

_She saw __**that**__? _

I felt my hope soar, and despite myself I felt a small smile creep to my lips before I could stop it.

"Oh my _God_, Bella, why are you _smiling_?" she hissed, horrified. I turned my expression back to neutral hurriedly.

"Because she's in love with him."

We both jumped violently. Jasper stood behind me, breathing down my neck.

"Wh… what?" stuttered Alice. If this situation wasn't so horribly complicated, I might have laughed.

"I finally get it," Jasper continued. "The waves of love, the layers of confusion. I finally caught the pattern. Whenever Bella is near Edward, there is confusion, and restraint. I put it down to Bella's change, and the unspoken things between them concerning what happened in the clearing, because the feelings were mixed up with so much love. But then I realised. That love was suppressed, until it would burst out in waves from time to time. Whenever she is near him. Near to Carlisle."

I looked down, suddenly ashamed. What must they think of me? Dedicated in heart, mind and soul to their brother, and then suddenly being overcome with desire for their adopted father, just days after their adoptive mother is killed?

_I am a terrible person. Geez. I am starting to sound like a stuck record_.

No one said anything, so I looked up again, after a time. Alice was gawking at me.

"You're… in _love_… with Carlisle?"

There was no point in denying it. I nodded miserably.

"How? Why? Wh…when?" she demanded, shocked.

I shrugged. "Ever since I woke up, from the change," I confessed. "Ever since I saw him again, in this form."

It all came spilling out of me, revealing things that even I hadn't realised, so determined had I been to repress it all.

"It was like I was truly seeing everything for the first time. Not just physically, but emotionally… spiritually. I felt so connected to Carlisle. First I thought it was because I was grieving for him, sorry for him, but then, I started seeing us together in my head. I started seeing stars whenever I looked at him. It was like… _shit_, it was like nothing else I have ever experienced. I can only compare it to what the wolves do, you know, imprinting. It was like my whole universe shifted just so that I could align myself with his. Edward just… slipped away."

I closed my eyes in despair. "I don't know why I feel this way, Alice, I really don't. I'm so sorry. But I have no control over it. I tried; I tried so hard to suppress it, to love Edward like I did before. Especially when you told me about your vision, about how much pain was going to be caused. But every time I try, it's like my soul is screaming. Screaming for him, and him alone."

_Wow. I had finally done it. Finally accepted the feelings inside me. And said them out loud. _

Tentatively, I opened my eyes. Alice was still as stone. Her eyes flickered to Jasper, and her eyes widened.

"Jazz, why are you _smiling_? Don't you know what this means?"

I turned to look at him, and almost gasped. I had never seen Jasper with such a goofy smile on his face.

"I can't help it," he said. "Bella is giving off such joy, such love… I can't help it," was all he could manage. I stared, agog. He honestly looked like he was about to float up into the air on a cloud of bliss.

_Was it really me causing that?_ _If I could have blushed, right now I would be several shades of beetroot._

"But what about… Edward?" Alice wailed. "What about Esme?"

I looked back at her, pained. "I don't know. I don't know… I mean, how can Carlisle feel anything for me anyway? He loves Esme. Even though she is gone, he isn't going to just stop loving her. He shouldn't. That would be wrong. I would be so wrong. I…"

I trailed off, feeling miserable again. Jasper clutched at my shoulder, steadying me.

"If Carlisle didn't have feelings for you, then why did Alice see her visions?" he asked, softly.

_Oh. God. _

The thought of Carlisle actually reciprocating my feelings was too much. I felt myself go down, slumping onto the floor with a crash.

Alice and Jasper knelt down with me. Alice had a softer look in her eyes now.

"Bella… I'm sorry, this just took me by total surprise…" she admitted. "But the way you describe it, and the fact that Carlisle must feel something along the same lines…"

She glanced at Jasper for confirmation of something, and he nodded.

"…Then it can only mean one thing."

I gaped at her like a fish. "What?"

"Edward was not your soulmate. Whatever feelings were tying you to him, they were not for the reasons you thought. They were bringing you into our family, bringing you into contact."

"With…?"

"Your true soulmate. The one soul that a vampire is meant to spend his or her eternity with…"

She glanced at Jasper with a small, happy smile for a moment.

"The one who makes you whole. Your true mate."

Her eyes were sparkling suddenly. I processed her words, hardly daring to believe them.

_Well, that explained a lot. But it didn't help the fact that this was a horrible, terrible mess._

"But Esme was Carlisle's soulmate," I protested, stubbornly.

"Was she?" Alice replied, mysteriously. She said no more, but leaned forward suddenly and hugged me.

I gasped, delighted and relieved at her touch.

"You… you don't hate me?" I mumbled into her shoulder.

"Bella!" she cried, breaking the embrace to look at me. "You're my sister. I could never hate you. You have shocked me, sure, but what's true is true. If you and Carlisle are meant to be together, then we will get through this, somehow."

"That we will," Jasper agreed, throwing his arms around the both of us.

"But what about your vision?" I whispered, suddenly remembering. "What about Edward? How can I hurt him like this, Alice? What can I do? What if your vision comes true, what if he tries to hurt Carlisle?"

"One step at a time, Bella. We'll deal with whatever fallout comes our way," Jasper said softly into my ear. He bathed us all in a serene ocean of calm, and I hoped, and prayed, that everything Alice had seen would not come to pass.

_But deep down, I knew that it would. _

_**A penny for your thoughts? Did you think Alice and Jasper would understand? Do you feel sorry for Edward? Are you eager for Bella and Carlisle to get on with it and confess their feelings already? Remember, reviews make me happy and smile a goofy smile like Bella gave Jasper! **_


	7. Chapter 7

_**OMG thank you all so much for the amazing reviews. ShayLeigh and Chistina you had me in stitches! :D Don't worry I will finish it I promise! **_

_**Okay, so there is a little bit more Bellisleness in this chapter, but I wanted to deal with Edward first. And then, yes, the Great Build-up will begin! And yes, I will be doing another CPOV – in the next chapter, in fact. **_

_**CHAPTER SEVEN**_

**APOV**

As Bella lay in my arms, and we breathed in Jasper's calming influence, my mind whirled none the less.

_My sister, my friend, in love with Carlisle_. I could scarcely believe it. And yet, it somehow seemed so right. When I thought of the two of them, they seemed to match perfectly. He and Esme had always been so loving, so _together,_ but at the same time I had always wondered why they seemed to lack that extra spark that Jasper and I had. That Rosalie and Emmett had.

Now I knew why.

I looked down at Bella and smiled. Please, _please let Edward understand. _

Bella stirred, and I let her get up. She looked at me, and I saw torment flicker across her face. I knew what she was thinking.

"You have to tell Edward," I said. "Not about Carlisle, yet, but about your lack of feelings for him. You have to let him know, it will only get worse."

Bella closed her eyes and nodded.

"I know."  
"Do you want me nearby?" Jasper asked, and I loved him so much right then. But Bella shook her head.

"No, it's okay Jasper. Thank you. But I have to face up to this. I have to do this alone. It's hurtful enough for Edward without an audience, even if you are there to support the both of us."

Jasper pursed his lips, but nodded. He understood, and so did I.

_Please, please let Edward_.

**BPOV**

Night was coming. I waited in the growing darkness, still able to see as clear as day, waiting for Edward. The air was still, and the trees seemed to stare at me, judging me.

I played back my conversation with Alice and Jasper, and was thankful that at least two people would still want to know me after all this was over.

He was there, suddenly. There was a renewed spark in his eyes. He smiled.

"Bella. Oh Bella."

He was in front of me in an instant, hands in my hair, lips pressed to mine. I kissed him back reluctantly.

_God, this was so hard._

"Bella," he breathed. "I'm so sorry. You've been through so much, and I haven't been here for you enough…"

"S'okay…" I stuttered, when he allowed me a moment for speech between kisses.

He broke away and took my face in his hands, smiling. His eyes danced.

"You're mine," he said, and my heart sank. It might not be alive anymore, but it sure as hell felt like it was.

"Edward…" I began, but he cut me off.

"Love, I know what you must think of me. How confused you must be, about what happened."

I looked down. He sighed.

"I failed you again. You needed me, and I abandoned you. Again."

"No, no you didn't," I said, squeezing his hand. He looked so sad, I couldn't bear it.

"I did. I can't forgive myself. I just… I saw you there, and suddenly it was all too real. When we talked about changing you, it was a possibility, an unwritten future. But you were dying. There was no alternative. If it went wrong, I would lose you forever. I was so scared… I just froze. I was terrified of hurting you, terrified of losing control. Terrified of losing you."

He pulled me into a tight embrace.

"I'm so sorry Bella. Forgive me."

"Nothing to forgive," I whispered. "It's okay to be scared Edward. It's only…"

"What, human?"

He pulled back to look at me with an amused smile.

I grinned. "Yeah. Human. See, you do still have a soul!"

He laughed, but still looked pained.

"I left you to die," he said in a small voice. I refused to believe that.

"No you didn't. Carlisle was there, everything was okay."

"But if he hadn't have been there…"

"Then you would have found the strength to do it. I know you would have, Edward. You wouldn't have let me die."

"I took the easy option. I made Carlisle do something he shouldn't have had to do. Not when Esme…"

He trailed off.

"Watching him change you, bite you… God, I truly am a monster, Bella."

I frowned. "Why?"

"Because instead of being grateful, for a moment… I was jealous. Jealous of those bites, jealous of those licks sealing the venom in… like kisses, all over you. You're mine, love, and for a moment it seemed like you were… his."

My mind reeled and my body shivered at the thought of Carlisle's lips all over me.

_Ohh…._

Heaven.

"So wrong…" I heard Edward mutter to himself. "What was I thinking?"

"You weren't yourself," I said, trying to appease him. "Don't worry about it."

_But I am his. And I always will be. _

I closed my eyes.

_Carlisle's lips all over me, kissing me, nipping at my skin. His hands everywhere, sliding, rubbing, pushing, pulling. Our bodies entwined, filled with nothing but insatiable hunger for one another…_

_Ohhhh. _

Edward's touch brought me back to the present. I opened my eyes to find his inches from mine, noses almost touching. I started as I realised what I saw in his eyes. They had darkened, not with thirst for blood, but with thirst for me.

"Bella…" he whispered, kissing my hair. "I've waited so long to be able to be with you. Know every part of you. Please…"

He started caressing me.

_Stop this, Bella. You have to stop this now._

"I thought you wanted to get married first," I gasped as his fingers grazed my breasts. I felt him smile into my neck.

"Yeah, well. You wanted to be a human when we first did this. Guess we can't always have what we want. But right now, I want only you. In every way possible."

His hands were everywhere, no longer gentle.

"Edward… wait… stop… no…" I protested, barely able to speak from all the kisses. He was hard and forceful now, the hunger taking over. He seemed not to hear, because he only explored further, held on tighter.

I tried to push him away, but found I couldn't. I didn't understand… I was a newborn. I should be stronger than he was.

_But something was crippling me. Guilt? Shame? Fear? _

I didn't want to hurt him. No... more than that. I didn't want to face the consequence.

He pushed me down, roughly now.

"Bella…"

"Edward, stop! No, please, I'm not ready…"

"You've always been ready, love," he soothed, claiming my mouth with his. He began to claw at my shirt, and I heard buttons popping off in every direction.

"Edward!" I cried, scared now. I had to stop this!

He growled, and ripped my shirt open completely, mouth leaving mine, and dipping down to claim my breasts. He trailed his tongue along the top of my bra, relishing the taste of my skin. His hands moved further down, finding my jeans and starting to pull them from my hips.

"Edward!" I cried again, thrashing now. Fear flooded me. He mistook this for passion and became even more forceful, reaching a hand up to tangle my hair and force my head up, neck exposed, for him to kiss.

I groaned, despite myself, then tried to sob, but ended up choking. His kisses became harder and harder.

Finally he paused, raising himself up above me to look down upon my trembling form. His hand reached out.

"Edward no, please!" I said weakly, wriggling away from him. Free from his clutches, I shot up at vampire speed, but he was as quick, seizing me and slamming me against a tree.

"Owww," I yelled, even thought it didn't really hurt that much. His mouth was over mine again, and he had my arms above my head, pressing my hands against the trunk, possessing me, keeping me captive.

I shoved him away with one last attempt to find my newborn strength. It seemed to break him out of the lusty craze, for a moment, and he looked at me in surprise. But it didn't work. He simply smirked.

"Tease," he growled.

_And why would he think anything else? I had wanted him. Always wanted him. Why would I be any different now?_

Poor Edward.

I put my hands up defensively as he came at me, smiling. His hands went either side of my shoulders, his body pinning me back against the tree again. I struggled free, but I tripped, falling, and his hand came to grab me again.

Then, there was a crack. Edward yowled.

I looked up in surprise.

Carlisle was standing over me, his hand clenched around Edward's, restraining him. Edward looked at him in shock.

"She. Said. She. Wasn't. Ready," Carlisle snapped, the strain in his voice clear. Edward paused for another half a second, before snatching his hand away.

"What the hell would you know?" he yelled, fury coursing through him. He went to shove Carlisle out of the way, but he held his ground, shielding me. He growled at Edward menacingly.

_Holy shit. Carlisle just growled. For me! _

They circled each other, like predators. Edward snarled, and Carlisle snarled back. He refused to back down, and Edward's rage grew. He attempted to shove past Carlisle again, but Carlisle was ready. He thrust Edward away from me and returned to my side, guarding me possessively.

"Look at her, Edward_. Look_ at her."

Edward stared at him, suddenly confused. He looked down at me, saw me cowering. Was I cowering? Yes, not from fear, but through guilt. Edward saw it as the former, though, and suddenly looked horrified with himself. He looked back up at Carlisle, and for a second I thought he was going to hit him.

But he didn't. He gave me another agonised look, before vanishing into the night.

My head swam.

Carlisle bent down to me, and I shut my eyes in some weird defence mechanism. I didn't want to see the look on his face. I didn't want to see his eyes pity me. I didn't want his kindness… I wanted his love. I wanted the lust that was in Edward's eyes, to be in his.

"Bella."

I had to open them again, of course. I felt his hands on my arms, so gentle. My eyelids fluttered open, and he was looking at me anxiously.

"Are you alright?" he asked, stroking my cheek with his thumb.

_Aaah. Sweet torture._

I couldn't bring myself to respond, so he got a tighter grip on me and lifted me to my feet. His eyes drifted over me for a moment, before they returned to my face rather hurriedly. From his body language, if he had not been vampire, I was sure he would have blushed.

_Oh shit. _

I suddenly remembered that Edward had ripped my shirt open. Embarrassed, I pulled it shut, covering the exposed tops of my breasts. Carlisle recovered himself, and drew me into his embrace.

"It's okay, Bella, it's okay," he soothed, as I trembled.

But I wasn't trembling because of what had happened. I was trembling at his touch.

I sank into him, and silently cursed. That could not have gone worse if I had tried.

My body went into shock, and I convulsed into tearless sobs. He held me, and held me, and held me, until I could sob no more, and everything just went blank from my mind.

_**Ooooh! Did you like possessive Carlisle? Rarrgh! :) Please review, pretty pretty please with Peters on top! **_


	8. Chapter 8

_**Third chapter of the day! Aren't I good to you!:) Hope you like it. This does, however, come with a forewarning I'm afraid. I will be away from Thursday until next Tuesday, taking the little one to visit family down south. But I will try and get at least one more chapter up before I go! **_

_**CHAPTER EIGHT**_

**CPOV**

I sat in my study, head reeling. Had I really just attacked my own son? _Over Bella?_

I looked across the room where she lay slumped in a chair, eyes fixed to the ceiling, where they had been since I put her there.

_What is wrong with me?_

I tried to convince myself that it was just a protective instinct. Bella had been upset, and Edward was going too far. I was just stepping in to help her.

But I knew it was so much more complex than that.

Ever since that moment when our eyes had locked together, she had been in my thoughts constantly. More than Esme, God forgive me.

I had loved Esme, with all my heart. But there was always that niggle in the back of my head, that crept in whenever I saw Emmett and Rosalie come back from breaking another house, intense and heady and pressed up so close it would take an unearthly force to part them. Whenever I saw Alice and Jasper, gazing at each other in a way that was entirely theirs alone, private and beautiful. And later, whenever I saw Edward looking at Bella.

What did they have that we didn't?

Alice often spoke of soulmates. Was Esme mine? Sometimes, I hadn't been sure. And I would push the thought to the back of my mind, and go back to loving my beautiful wife.

Now, everything had changed. _Because of Bella._

When we had hunted together, I could not stop thinking about how beautiful she was. _How perfect, how strong, how amazing_.

When she held me in the woods, I had wanted to stay there in her arms forever.

Then, I had thought of Edward, mercifully, and been able to walk away.

But as I looked at her now, knowing that at some point she would snap out of her trance and we would have to talk about… this…

I wasn't sure if I had the strength left in me to walk away again.

**BPOV**

Slowly, gradually, the ceiling came into focus. I stared at it for a while, unblinking, of course, and wondered groggily where I was.

Did I fall asleep?

_Don't be an idiot, Bella. You're a vampire. You don't sleep! _

Although I must have gone into some kind of trance, because it was morning, and I couldn't remember the night at all. Or the evening. Hang on…

_Oh God._

_Edward. _

It all came flooding back. Edward's insistence, Carlisle protecting me, me collapsing in his arms…

I sat bolt upright and realised I was in his study, collapsed into a comfy chair. He was sitting behind his desk, chin on his hands, staring at me.

I felt myself flush. Nothing happened to my cheeks, of course, but it felt like they were burning all the same, if they could.

"What happened?" I asked, not sure I wanted to know.

He lifted his chin off his hands, and smiled. "You curled up into a ball and went someplace in your head. I carried you in here, and you've been staring at the ceiling ever since."

"Oh. God. Sorry…" I muttered, stretching and leaning forward.

_Pop. _

I jumped and look down. My ripped shirt was held together with some pins. I almost laughed at the thought of Carlisle doing that; protecting my modesty.

Well, _had _been held together. Leaning forward against the tight material had caused the shirt to strain and pop them off. I pulled the two halves across myself quickly, wishing he had ripped the whole damn thing off me instead of trying to cover me up.

"Here, let me," he muttered, somewhat throatily for Carlisle. He grabbed a handful of safety pins and walked over, crouching to hook my shirt back together again. His hands brushed my skin as he did so, and an electric current jolted through us. Even Carlisle jumped.

His eyes shot up to mine, and it took everything I had not to reach out and grab him, pulling him to my lips.

He kept looking at me, for a little too long, and his eyes began to darken.

"Bella," he began, and then thought the better of it.

"What?" I pressed, surprised when my voice managed to avoid coming out as a squeak.

"How… how are you feeling? Are you alright?" he questioned, and I knew that was not what he had intended to say originally.

I felt for him, then. It must be so confusing for him. If we were truly soulmates as Alice had said, and he was feeling the same intense feelings I was feeling, he must be feeling so many other emotions. Guilt being the greatest, because for all Alice's talk of Esme not being "the one", I knew he must have loved her deeply.

"Yeah, I'm okay. He just… scared me, that's all."

A slight frown crept across Carlisle's face. _Damn he looked sexy when he did that._

"Is everything okay between you and Edward?" he asked. "You seemed… distant. And now, this happens. What's going on, Bella? Do you regret what happened? Changing? Do you regret… what I did to you?"

_Oh God, he thinks I don't want to be a vampire?_

I looked into his eyes, and saw so much guilt there. Guilt, for Esme. Guilt, for me. Guilt, for not protecting those he loved better. Guilt for failing?

I made a snap decision then. No more holding back. No more restraint. What came out of my mouth, came out, so help me God.

"Of course I don't," I said, fiercely. "I have never wanted anything so much as to be part of your family, Carlisle. All I want is to be with you."

He missed the meaning in that last part, associating it with the Cullens as a whole. I knew he would.

"Are you sure, Bella? I wanted to save you, just like the others, but… is that my undoing? Saving others for my own selfish reasons, rather than stopping to think about whether they wanted to be saved?"

"I _did_ want to be saved," I said, crossly. "You know I did. Stop beating yourself up, Carlisle. There is nothing you have ever done that wasn't right, believe me. And saving me wasn't selfish, anyway. You were doing it for me, and… Edward."

He pursed his lips. "Was I?" he asked, so softly that had I not been vampire, I would not have heard it. I stared at him.

"You… did it for you?" I asked, hopeful.

He looked at me in surprise, not having expected me to be so bold as to ask that.

"Yes," he said after a moment. He swallowed. "I didn't want you to die, Isabella."

He closed his eyes and walked to the other side of the room.

"Say my name again," I heard myself say. He turned and looked at me curiously.

"Sorry?"

"Say my name again. Please. I love it when you say my name like that…"

"Isabella…" he said, but this time it was somewhere between a plea and a protest.

I sighed.

"I don't love Edward anymore," I said. There. It was done.

Carlisle gaped at me.

"But… you are soulmates! Bella, how can you say this? I have seen the way you both look at each other. The way you fit together, make each other whole. Edward… he _adores_ you."

"I know," I said, in little more than a whisper. "And I did adore him too. But now, now that I am… _this_…" I waved down at my vampire self, "I see things more clearly."

"Then I surely am damned," Carlisle replied, "For it seems I should not have turned you."

He looked aghast. "I'm sorry Bella."

I thought for a moment he was going to cry.

"No! Don't you see? Don't you understand?" I cried, jumping up from the chair and startling us both. I stalked over to him, stood face to face with him.

"Don't you feel it too?" I asked, pleadingly. He stared at me, trying so hard to fight whatever it was that was welling up inside him.

"Please don't fight it," I begged. "Please, let it surface!"

He turned away, pacing back across the room.

"I don't love Edward anymore, because when I turned, I saw things the way they should be. I saw where my universe was. I saw who I was supposed to be with. Who my soulmate was. My _true_ soulmate."

Carlisle turned back to me, a mixture of hope and joy in his darkening eyes, mingled with sadness, and loss, and guilt.

"_You're_ my soulmate, Carlisle. I love you. I have _always_ loved you, I just didn't know it. And I don't care how long I have to wait, how long it takes for you to grieve Esme, to heal… I will wait for you. I love you so much…"

I couldn't finish, because the breath was suddenly squashed from me. Carlisle had literally flown across the room, slamming me against the wall. His lips were pressed to mine, his hands pulling me hard against him. I gasped, not quite believing that this was real.

"Isabella…" he breathed, fulfilling my earlier request. "My sweet, sweet… Isabella…"

I surrendered to him; kissing him back with a passion I had never felt before, not even in the headiest days with Edward. We wrapped our arms around each other, clinging to each other as if our lives depended on it, afraid that some force would come and rip us apart.

"Carlisle," I breathed back, "Oh God, Carlisle…"

We moved across the room as one, lips never parting. My head was whirling, dancing, rejoicing….

My back was turned to the door when it crashed open. I froze, expecting Edward.

"Jesus Christ Alice!" Carlisle exclaimed, and I breathed a sigh of relief. But not for long, for when I turned and looked at her face, my stomach flipped.

"Edward…" she said, gulping for air. "He was outside. He read Carlisle's thoughts. Saw how much he wanted you…" she trailed off, looking at me.

"He was furious, but then he went still. He heard Carlisle's thoughts as you said the things you said to him, and as he kissed you."

I closed my eyes, and wished I could close my ears, not wanting to hear the rest.

"He realised then that Bella felt the same."

"Where is he?" Carlisle sighed. He was angry with himself, I could tell. I squeezed his hand.

"This isn't your fault," I said. "It's mine."

Alice took a step forwards. "He's gone, into the trees," she said, voice trembling.

"Like in your vision?" I asked, suddenly afraid.

"Yes," she whispered.

And I knew then that everything Alice had seen would come to pass.

_**Reviews make me happy, like Carlisle with whipped cream on top! Ooh, hold that thought… **_


	9. Chapter 9

_**Okay, I apologise. I distracted you guys before with talk of Carlisle and cream ;P**_

_**To make up for it, I declare a content warning: Get ready for a little, teasing taste of lemon! **_

_**CHAPTER NINE**_

**BPOV**

I stood looking at Alice helplessly.

"What do we do?"

"Jasper's gone after him," she replied. "But I just see him coming home alone."

I closed my eyes again, despair washing through me.

Carlisle shuffled beside me. "Alice, I know what you must think of me…"

She was in front of him like a shot, arms engulfing him in a squeeze. He took several steps backwards in surprise.

"Don't be sorry," she whispered to him. "This is meant to be. Whatever happens… Jasper and I are here for you."

She broke away and looked into his eyes. His face was deeply touched by her words.

"We love you, Carlisle," she smiled. "We want you to be happy."

"Thank you Alice, you don't know how much that means," he replied, pulling me into his arms and holding me close.

_Bliss._

"What the _hell_ is going on?" a shrill voice suddenly yelled. Oh God. I had forgotten about Rosalie.

She came charging into the room, Emmett on her tail, still yelling. "Why did Edward just take off like he's been shot, with Jasper racing after hi…"

She stopped dead mid-word, catching sight of me, in Carlisle's arms. Rather than distance himself, he tightened his grip, resting his cheek against the top of my head.

_The room span again. I seriously needed to adjust myself to this heavenly orbit_.

Emmett gaped. So did Rosalie, for a moment, before her expression changed to one of disgust.

"Rosalie…" Alice warned. Her sister ignored her.

I waited for the barrage of abuse that would surely fall from her beautiful, perfect lips. But nothing came. She simply stared, until the look of disgust turned to one of disappointment as she looked at Carlisle.

"Got over Esme quick, didn't you?" she said, so softly we all had to strain to hear it. I felt Carlisle tense, and I knew she had accurately inflicted her wound as intended.

She turned on her heel and marched out without another word, not even caring if Emmett followed her or not. He didn't. He stood, still gaping.

"Emmett, you look like a fish," said Alice eventually, trying to lighten the mood.

"But… how… when… Bella?" he stuttered. Alice walked over to him and put an arm around his waist.

"Emmett, you remember how it was when you woke up and saw Rose?" she asked softly. He looked down at his sister and swallowed, momentarily transported back into a beautiful memory. After a moment, he nodded.

"When Bella woke up, she felt that way about Carlisle. No matter how hard she fought it, she came to realise that he was the other half of her soul. Carlisle felt it too. They complete each other, Emmett. I know the timing is dire, but…"

"They're… soulmates?" Emmett questioned, eyes wide. He looked up at us with an expression of wonderment, then broke into the Emmett grin we knew and loved.

"Baby Bells," he teased. "You've been holding out on us!"

I smiled, and felt Carlisle release me as I skipped forward into his waiting bear hug.

"Always the drama queen," he chuckled, before looking serious. "Geez, though. No wonder Edward was so cut up."

I looked back at Alice worriedly. She looked even paler than usual, if that was possible, and although she tried to hide it, there was genuine fear for her brother in her eyes.

"What did you see?" Emmett asked, catching on quicker than I would have given him credit for.

Carlisle looked to Alice as well, and I suddenly realised that he didn't know. I rushed back to him, taking his hands and squeezing them.

"I'm afraid," I whispered. He kissed the top of my head, oh so softly, before looking back at Alice.

"What did you see?" he asked, echoing Emmett.

"I saw Edward in pain. Crazed, in the trees, pounding out his rage. He said things, but I couldn't hear all of them. Then he was in the house, smashing things up. He…"

She gulped and trailed off. Carlisle's eyes darkened momentarily.

"He comes for me, doesn't he."

It was a statement, not a question. Alice nodded miserably.

"What happens?"

"I don't know. I see him throw you, and then I see him ready to attack again. Then the vision ends."

She couldn't bring herself to meet Carlisle's eyes. "The look on his face… he looks like he wants to kill you."

An aura of upset and worry gripped the room. I clung to Carlisle. The thought of Edward harming him was unbearable.

"I won't let him hurt you," I heard myself say, fiercely, and to my chagrin, Carlisle chuckled. I looked up in surprise, and he placed a finger under my chin.

"And here I was thinking that _I_ was _your _hero, Isabella Swan."

His eyes darkened again, and he leaned in to kiss me. I met his lips with mine eagerly, wrapping my arms around him as he pulled me close, kissing and kissing until the world span away once more.

"Ahem."

Alice and Emmett both cleared their throats unsubtly at the same time. We ignored them for a moment longer; Carlisle's tongue briefly sliding into my mouth and seeking mine. I let out a small moan, and put my hands up to his face, clinging to him, pulling him even deeper into our kiss.

"_Ahem_."

Reluctantly we broke apart, looking down at the floor in blissful embarrassment like a couple of lovestruck teenagers. Alice smirked. Emmett burst out laughing.

I felt a wave of relief wash through me. I knew then, that if we could only get past Edward, everything was going to be okay.

**CPOV**

Jasper returned quickly. As expected, he had not been able to bring Edward back. Despite his power over emotion, he had been unable to even get near to him, let alone talk to him.

I sighed. The three of them had left us to it, to "enjoy some privacy," as Emmett had put it, in a rather suggestive manner. There was little we could do about Edward, until he chose to make himself known, or Alice had a more specific vision.

I turned from closing the door behind them, to see Bella leaning against my desk, a blissful smile on her lips.

God forgive me, but the feeling that passed through me as I looked at her was the most incredible feeling I had ever felt in all my years. And there were many of them.

_Bella was mine. My love, my mate. The reason for my being. The other half of my soul. _

"Are you alright?" I heard her ask, vaguely, and I drifted back down to earth. I smiled reassuringly.

"Of course. How could I not be?"

I walked over to her, suddenly desperate to reach out and touch her, make sure she was real. I tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear, and stroked her cheek, smiling as she closed her eyes in sheer delight.

"You are beautiful, Isabella," I whispered. She opened her eyes again, biting her lip. I knew a redness would be creeping across that cheek if it could be. I smiled.

"Ah, if only your blush had come with you when you changed!"

Her eyes widened, and she shook her head.

"That's one thing I_ don't_ miss!" she insisted, putting her hand over mine and squeezing. I felt a rush of regret.

"Are there many things you do miss, Isabella?" I asked her sadly. She shook her head.

"My family, obviously. But I will see them again, sooner than I hoped, I think. I am a vampire of great restraint, so I've been told!"

I laughed. "Very true. It won't be easy… but we will make it work somehow."

My hand trailed her cheek again. She captured it with both hands and looked at it, smiling, before lightly kissing each finger.

"And as for your restraint… well, I look forward to breaking that, little by little," I murmured into her ear, causing her to shiver in delight.

"Carlisle, you make me feel… so… loved," she said, eyes boring into mine. "Thank you for loving me. Thank you for giving me someone to love, so… deeply."

"I adore you," I whispered. She smiled, and flung herself into me, wrapping her arms around me so tightly I thought I would break. She felt me wince, and shot me a sheepish grin.

"Sorry. Newborn strength. Forgot!"

She gazed at me thoughtfully, before taking my hand and trailing it along her face, down her neck and across her collarbone.

"I thought I would miss the things I felt when Edward touched me," she said, frowning. I felt my stomach flip at the mention of her and Edward, despite myself.

"But the sensations remain the same. They haven't gone. Well, except for the racing heart and the flushing. But you know what?"

I swallowed. She was looking at me as though she was going to eat me.

_Her lips, tongue, teeth, all over me…_

"Now, with _you_, those sensations are a thousand times greater."

A huge grin spread across my face before I could stop it. I felt like a giddy schoolboy.

_What have you done to me, Isabella Swan?_

But even as I asked the question in my head, I already knew the answer. I closed my eyes, silently thanking Esme for blessing me with her presence in my life, before asking for her blessing to move on.

_Isabella Swan had brought me back to life. _

**BPOV**

He was here, with me. He felt the same. This was real. Our love… was real.

I watched him as he closed his eyes, a big, stupid grin on his face.

_I did that to him! _

I felt like grinning myself. I was beyond joy. I was euphoric.

Suddenly, though, I felt a thirst. A need, an ache, for him to be against me, inside me, one with me.

I was only inches away from him but I slammed against him with force, knocking him back to the far wall. He let out a surprised noise but I muffled it with my lips pressed against his, hard, and passionate.

"Bella…" he moaned, hands sliding beneath my shirt and up the curve of my back, causing me to arch in ecstasy. I pressed harder against him, feeling immense lust rush through me.

_I want you so much…_

I slid my hands up and down his god-like body, leaving his mouth momentarily to nip at the skin of his neck with my teeth, and lick tantalisingly with my tongue. He groaned, and I felt him harden against me.

_He wants me too…_

I pushed myself even harder against him, slowly rocking my hips as I did so, and I swear to God I could feel him trembling.

_Shit, I was actually good at this! _

Confidence flooding through me, I grew bolder. I tore at the perfect shirt on his perfect body, smiling to myself as the perfect buttons all went flying. I wanted to bring him to his knees, watch him lose that perfect control, if only for a moment.

_Wow, what was up with me? I was on fire! _

Momentarily foiled by an obstinate button, I growled and yanked hard, ripping the shirt off him entirely.

_Oh. My God. _

If he was perfect before, he was divine now. I took a step back to drink in his naked chest, watching in amazement as my own hands trailed up and down, longing to feel my own bare skin pressed up against his.

"Carlisle," I breathed lustily, aware that a silly grin was spreading across my face. I was so happy. I looked up into his eyes, and my head was suddenly reeling.

His eyes were dark. Much darker than before. Almost black. There was something primal, animalistic, in them. Something very… vampire.

_Something very sexy._

I felt myself growing wet as he advanced, seizing my hands and lifting them off his chest. He was pushing me back, back, back, until I was the one pressed up against the wall, gasping and moaning as he pressed against me and was suddenly everywhere at once with his lips and his tongue and his hands.

I was no longer the one in control. He dominated every part of me, sending the most sensual pleasure spiralling through my bones.

I felt him tense, and then move back for a moment. I gazed into his dark eyes as he drank me in, a lazy smile on his lips.

"Isabella…" he said, followed by a low growl. "_My_ Isabella."

He leaned in and bit down on my neck. I gasped, from both pleasure and pain.

_He was marking me. Marking me as his one true mate. _

Somewhere in the recess of my brain, which had long surrendered control to the desires of my body, I knew he was making a stand against Edward with that mark. Claiming me as his, and his alone.

The notion sent a fresh wave of desire flooding through me.

"Carlisle," I moaned. "I need you…"

He whirled me around and pushed me down onto the hardness of his desk, leaning over me and gazing at me, eyes dripping with desire.

"You're so beautiful, Isabella," he whispered, as his hands moved to my shirt and ripped it apart where the safety pins were still holding it together. A smile quirked his lips as he tore the entire piece of material off me in one go. "So, so beautiful."

His fingers were caressing me, trailing the top of my bra. The deep green lace brought a second smile, and he sighed blissfully.

I watched in fascination as his eyes changed with each moment that passed.

I knew that little by little, he was losing his control.

_How I ached to see it happen! _

His fingers trailed down my stomach, lingering at the top of my jeans. They toyed with the waist, before swiftly undoing the button and zip. Suddenly, they were pressed against the material beneath. All that lay between those achingly sensuous fingers, and my core.

I shuddered with delight.

I knew that little by little, I was edging closer to a precipice. One that I was going to willingly fall over, with all of my soul.

I was his, and his alone. I wanted him, desired him, needed him, loved him. He was mine, and I was his. For eternity. For always. Bella and Carlisle, two halves of one soul.

I sensed my own eyes blacken, deeper and deeper, as I gazed into the eyes of my one true love.

_And I trembled slightly, in anticipation of all the ecstasy I knew was about to come. _

_**SORRY! Please don't hate me for stopping there! I am a terrible tease, I know, but I am so tired and have to get up early in the morning. I will now be away until Tuesday 10**__**th**__**, I may (and I stress, MAY) be able to update while I am away, if I get a moment or two, but in all probability it won't be until Tuesday or Wednesday. But the good news is, the next chapter will be lemon, glorious lemon, plus I will be able to go back to daily updates when I return! **_

_**In the meantime, remember. Carlisle and whipped cream, Carlisle and whipped cream... Happy dreaming, lovelies! ;) **_


	10. Chapter 10

_**I'm back! Had a lovely time with the family. SO sorry I didn't manage to update straight away when I got back, time has been limited, plus I really struggled to tackle this chapter. It's amazing how easy it is to write lemon for yourself, but when you know other people are going to be reading it, you suddenly become your own worst critic. Hope it came out ok! **_

_**WARNING: CONTAINS LEMONS!**_

_**CHAPTER TEN**_

**APOV**

I sat and watched the boys playing whatever computer game they were currently addicted to, but I couldn't focus on the screen. I was too worried about what was to come. About where Edward had gone, about whether Rose would come around, and about how we would react when Edward finally showed up again. Despite our support for Carlisle, I did not want to see Edward hurting. None of us did.

Slowly, the room, Jasper and Emmett slipped out of focus too. I went rigid; a vision was coming. Jasper must have turned and looked at me because I felt him at my side instantly, hands steadying me with his love.

_Oh. Oh no. Oh God. No, don't want to see… too much… not that!_

The vision left quickly, mercifully, and I found myself staring into two pairs of worried eyes.

"Was it about Edward and Carlisle?" asked Emmett, and I guessed that I must have been protesting aloud.

"Did you see where Edward has gone?" came Jasper's query.

I shook my head. "No, it wasn't about any of that…" I mumbled, looking embarrassed.

"Then what…?" Jasper trailed off as I looked down, wriggling uncomfortably.

"Nothing. Don't want to talk about it. Was just… something I really didn't want to see."

A crash sounded from within the house. It sounded like a bookcase had tipped over.

Jasper caught on quickly, and couldn't stop the smirk from spreading across his face.

"Oh."

Emmett was slightly slower. "What? What did she see?"

Jasper turned to him and grinned.

"I think she just saw a little more of Bella and Carlisle than she would have liked!"

Emmett looked between the two of us, and dissolved into loud guffaws.

I glowered at him, and prayed that no more such visions would come to me ever, _ever_ again.

**BPOV**

Somehow, at some point, Carlisle had relieved me of my jeans. I couldn't recall him doing so… I remembered him unzipping me, touching me, and then my mind was a little hazy up until this point, where he had ripped away my bra and begun caressing my breasts with his lips and tongue.

I knew it must have been good, because my head was swimming and my body was tingling like crazy. An ache, an insatiable need, was growing deep inside me, and I heard myself moan loudly as Carlisle's lips moved over my nipples, teeth nipping and tongue flicking and caressing in their wake. His hands were moving up and down my sides, alternating between grabbing my flesh roughly, trailing teasingly with his fingertips, and scratching hard with his nails. I bit back a scream as he sucked on my left nipple, one hand grabbing my side hard and the other scraping a sharp trail down my stomach.

"Bella, oh Bella," he murmured, repeating my name over and over as if I was his goddess.

I looked down at his tousled blond hair, and plunged my hands in, gripping at strands and feeling the locks slip in and out of my fingers.

_God he had gorgeous hair._

A low growl emanated from him, and he broke away from worshipping my breasts to look up. I gasped. His eyes were positively feral, but at the same time filled with such love it stunned me.

"I love you, Isabella," he smiled, before pushing himself up and capturing my mouth in a possessive kiss that all but devoured me. My head swam again.

_Carlisle Cullen is kissing me_, my brain repeated to itself, as if disbelieving still. _Carlisle is making love to me. Carlisle is going to be inside me…_

Oh God, the very thought! The knowledge of where these incredible ministrations were going made me shiver in delight. The thought of Carlisle's hardness entering me, moving inside me...

I clutched harder at his hair and made him gasp.

"Carlisle! Oh Carlisle, I need you… take me… _please_!"

He continued his kissing, but harder this time. I felt his hardness grow larger still against me.

"Mmmmph…" he groaned into my lips.

"Please! Oh God… Carlisle, I want you inside me so bad…"

He growled, and a shudder of excitement bolted through me. He broke away from our kiss, and looked down at me, naked except for my lacy green knickers.

He seemed to get a hold on himself for a moment, long enough to ask me, "Are you sure? I… I want your first time to be special, Bella…"

I pouted at him. "Carlisle, I don't care about silk sheets or candles right now. All I care about is you. Here. With me. Right now."

I heard a growl, and realised it was coming from me. Carlisle smiled at the sound, and growled low in response.

"Then let me have you…" he whispered mischievously, pulling me to him again. We grappled with each other and rolled off the desk, oblivious to our rock hard bodies crashing to the floor. Carlisle was on top of me, then I was on top of him. And so it went, as we fought playfully for dominance. Suddenly, I decided to jump up, moving across the room at lightning speed and pressing myself up against one of the bookcases. I raised an eyebrow and smiled suggestively at him, as he got to his feet and started to advance with a grin.

"Stay where you are," I said in a low but commanding voice. He stopped, eyebrow quirked in expectation.

Slowly, seductively, I hooked my thumbs into the lace that skimmed my hips, and ever so slowly eased them down, gyrating my hips as I did so. Carlisle's gaze was fixed on them as they slid further down. He licked his lips; once, twice.

My knickers landed on the floor, and I stepped out of them, looking at him with fire in my eyes, and everywhere else in my body for that matter. It felt so much more intense now that I was used to being permanently cold.

His gaze returned to my eyes, locking into them with intensity.

"Turn around," he said. It was an order, not a request. I felt myself grow wet again.

Slowly, I turned around, smiling to myself as I imagined him taking in my every detail. Far from being disappointed that I did not get to do this as a human, I was ecstatic. As a vampire, I was a hundred times more confident. I wanted to show off my body, wanted him to look at me. I would never have been this forward, this powerfully seductive, if I had still been Human Bella. My sudden boldness turned me on even more.

I turned full circle, so that I was facing him again.

"Satisfied, Doctor Cullen?" I teased. Calling him by his title seemed to have a huge effect on him, because his eyes suddenly glittered and the bulge in his trousers strained harder against the material.

He was against me in less than a quarter of a second; hands everywhere again. Before I could even register him being there, his hands had mine pinned above my head while his mouth claimed mine hungrily, moving down my jaw line, down to my neck, across my collarbone and between my breasts. His hands slid from mine down my arms, trailing onto my sides and grazing the skin so lightly it made me shudder in delight.

Then he was all roughness and passion again, grabbing at me and grinding himself against my core.

"Doctor Cullen," I managed to pant, between kisses, "I think… you are a _little… oh God! _Overdre…. _SSED_!"

My body was not my own any longer. He possessed it entirely, setting it alight with sensations I had not previously known to have existed. Somehow, I managed to focus on my hands long enough to slide my fingers into the band of his trousers, scratching the skin beneath, before moving around to unfasten the button and fly. I pressed my hand against him and he moaned, the breath catching in his throat as I moved inside and rubbed against him through the material of his boxers.

"Bella! God_, Isabella_…"

I'm not entirely sure what happened next. I know that he was suddenly naked, and I got lifted into the air, legs wrapped around him, and that we kissed, and caressed, and span about. I'm just not sure what order we did it all in, because it happened so fast, and my mind was on fire, just like my body. I was vaguely aware of a crashing sound, and things flying this way and that, as we grappled with each other in our passion.

When his fingers touched me, I think I forgot my own name.

"_Ohhhhh_…."

We had come to rest on the desk again, me sitting on it, him standing, pressed against me, leaning into me. His fingers were between my legs, moving slowly, gently, in a teasing manner. Then, they were faster, harder, and as they rubbed against the nub, sending waves of unbearable arousal through me, I cried out his name again and again.

"Bella… you're so wet for me," he murmured in approval as he slid a finger inside me. I screamed.

He moved inside me with skill, sliding another in, and another, before he had me bucking and writhing beneath him, going back and forth between incomprehensible whimpers and loud, lucid screams.

"Oh my God, oh my God, Carlisle, you're incredible," I gabbled in gasping, heaving breaths. "Oh, oh yes, oh God yes, Carlisle I'm going to… I'm gonna…. mmmmmmph… please!"

He whispered in my ear, his voice so sweet and soft and dripping with honey that it tipped me over the edge.

"_Come for me, Isabella_."

I cried out his name as I exploded beneath him, stars filling my head in an unearthly whirl. Pleasure ripped through me, waves and waves of it flooding my bones, making me shudder and squeal, until it slowly subsided into a happy, lazy contentment. I felt like I was floating.

I clung to him, fingers curled tightly in his hair. "I love you, I love you, I love you," I heard myself saying over and over again. He smiled into my neck, kissing me again and again, before nuzzling my cheek and telling me he loved me too.

Gradually, I came back to reality, managing to focus on his eyes as he pulled back to look at me.

"M…more…" I stammered, and he laughed, eyes shining.

"As you desire, my love."

He pushed against me, face buried in my shoulder as he nipped and kissed me. I felt his hard member press against me as he pulled me to him, off the table and onto my unsteady feet.

Wanting to give him the pleasure he just gave me, I reached out and took him in my hand, sliding and rubbing, soft, then hard. He gave muffled, guttural moans into my hair and shoulder, and I smiled as I felt him shudder against me.

I spun us around, pressing him against the desk, and continued to pump him, varying between slow and fast, hard and light. I watched in fascination as he closed his eyes and tilted his head back, the enjoyment clear on his face. His breath caught as he opened his eyes, a loud groan escaping his lips.

"Bella… Bella… _yes_…"

I looked him up and down, drinking in his beautiful body. He was perfect in every way, and he was mine! An eternity with this man… my head span at the thought of it. What the hell had I done to be worthy of this wonderful fate?

My hand quickened with the increased urgency of his breathing. His hands were gripping my arms now, nails digging into the skin as if his life depended on never letting me go. He pulled me in for a kiss, gasping and moaning into my mouth as our tongues collided.

"Bella, oh Isabella, yes, yes… fuck!"

My eyes widened as he swore. I had never expected something like that to fall from his perfect lips, and it turned me on no end. Carlisle was losing his grip on his control; he was turning wild, and feral. And I was the cause of it.

A new wave of pleasure rippled through me at this realisation.

"Isabella. Oh God Isabella, I love you… don't stop, don't… ohh, God, yes… I'm… going… to…"

No more words came, for they were lost in the cry that escaped his mouth as it crushed into mine. I felt hot liquid spurt into my hand and against my belly, and I practically purred in delight.

"Bella… you are amazing…" he managed to murmur as his breathing gradually slowed, and his arms came around me, head nuzzled into my chest. He fell to his knees, and looked up at me, eyes worshipping me.

I had never felt so turned on in my life.

I fell to my knees as well, taking his face in my hands and kissing him passionately. Breaking away again, I smiled and looked at him as I licked my fingers clean.

"Now do that again… inside me," I whispered, grinning wickedly as he grew hard again immediately.

_Ah, the joys and advantages of a vampire body…_

Our heads both whipped up together. Someone was racing to the door.

Carlisle was up in a flash, grabbing a sheet from the back of the room that conveniently happened to be there, covering a painting that was waiting to be hung. In a fraction of a second he was back beside me and we were wrapped up in it.

_This had better be important,_ I grumbled to myself internally.

Another second, and the door burst open.

"Emmett," Carlisle acknowledged, calmly.

Emmett gawked at us, slightly shocked for a moment, then grinned.

"Nice one pops," he winked at Carlisle.

_Thank God I couldn't blush, thank God I couldn't blush…_

His eyes moved to take in the rest of the room, and he gaped. I frowned, looking around me.

_Oh my. _

The room was in disarray. Two bookshelves had tipped over, books strewn across the floor. There was broken glass, splintered wood…

_Holy shit._ Carlisle's study looked like a bomb had hit it.

_A love bomb._

I smirked despite myself.

I looked back to Emmett. Alice had joined him in the doorway. I frowned again – an extremely worried look had crossed his face.

"What's wrong?" I asked. Alice was smiling.

"He's worried that he has contenders," she chuckled.

"Contenders for what?"

Carlisle chuckled too. I was clearly missing the joke, and threw Alice a questioning gaze.

"Breaking the most houses," she said softly, before breaking into a chiming laugh.

_Oh._

Carlisle gave me a squeeze.

"And to think, we haven't even done _it_ yet…" he hissed in my ear, just loud enough for Emmett to hear.

_Oh, you tease!_

Poor Emmett looked like he was going to burst. As did Alice, trying to contain her laughter.

"Serves you right for mocking my vision earlier," she chided him.

_Oh God, she hadn't seen _that much_, had she_?

She threw me a mildly disgusted look that said _yes, I bloody well had. _

Carlisle cleared his throat. "I presume you had good reason for interrupting us, other than to gawk, Emmett?" he smiled, though his voice was serious now.

"Yes," they both said at once. Alice waved a hand at Emmett to continue.

"Rosalie's gone," he said, his usual grin giving way to concern.

"What exactly do you mean by gone?" I asked.

Alice stepped further into the room, worry creasing her brow again.

"She's left Forks. She's being smart… she keeps purposefully changing her mind so I can't see where she is going. But we think…"

She faltered, glancing at Emmett and back to us again.

"We think… we think she's gone after Edward."

_**Please do review! Reviews make me happy, and enough of 'em ensure that Carlisle will lose that control sooner rather than later, if you get my drift… **_


	11. Chapter 11

_**Ok, you've been asking for some Carlisle VS Edward action, so here it is! No lemons, but they'll be back soon, promise…**_

**CHAPTER ELEVEN**

**BPOV**

About an hour had passed since Emmett and Alice told us about Rosalie. It seemed like longer. We were pacing around in the main living room, trying to decipher what it meant.

"I'm sure she only means well," Carlisle kept saying. "She wants to try and help Edward through his pain."

"Or encourage vengeance," I sighed, but the others shook their heads.

"Rosalie would never seek to hurt Carlisle," Alice told me. "Despite her harsh words. If anything, I imagine she has gone after him because she believes he will do just that."

I had actually been talking about me, rather than Carlisle, but I let it lie. At least Rosalie's leaving was hopefully a positive thing. But part of me still wondered if she had gone to side with him. I knew how badly she disliked me.

Carlisle's gaze settled on me, and I saw concern cross his face. He was at my side instantly, ushering me to the corner of the room.

"I'm ok," I went to protest, but he silenced me with a brief kiss.

"You need to hunt," he whispered, squeezing my hand. I looked at him in surprise, and then caught a glimpse of my eyes in a mirror. Almost instantly I became aware of the burning in my throat, and wondered how I had not noticed it earlier.

"It's alright," he smiled, seeing my mixed look of annoyance and frustration, mingled with hunger. "You're newborn, Isabella. You need to feed more regularly than we do."

I nodded, and sighed. "I'll go now. And no… you don't need to go with me. I'll be alright."

He raised an eyebrow, but I gave him a look that told him to say no more. He looked torn, but then Alice approached, a worried look in her eyes again.

"Carlisle, I need to talk to you," she said, and I took the opportunity to slip from the room before my beloved could stop me.

I stilled my breath and shot into the forest, a blur to everything else around me as I careered through the trees, already showing impressive finesse. I would have laughed at the thought, had I not been concentrating so hard on where I was going. I paused momentarily in a tree, inhaling deeply to seek out the best scent.

I almost fell from the tree, so startling and sweet was the smell that hit me.

_Humans_.

**CPOV**

I tried to concentrate on Alice as she paced up and down before me, but my thoughts kept worrying about Isabella. We had moved from the main room back to my study, as Alice wanted to talk to me alone.

"I've seen so many outcomes, Carlisle," Alice whispered, unconsciously wringing her hands in a most human fashion. "But the one I see most is the one I fear most."

I forced myself to concentrate, then looked down; somehow I suspected what that outcome was. But I was wrong, for her next question threw me totally.

"Carlisle, if it came down to it… could you… kill Edward?"

My eyes shot up to hers in shock. "What?" I heard myself ask in horror. "Alice, how can you even ask that…?"

I paused, knowing she must have seen something to give her good reason to ask, and recovered myself a little.

"I would fight for my life, yes. But kill him? I could not… I would rather die."

"What if it wasn't a choice between your life and his?" she asked sadly. I felt myself tense; not wanting to hear what came next.

"What if it was a choice between killing Edward, or watching Bella die?"

I closed my eyes against the pain that came with such a thought.

"Edward…" I whispered. "Edward would not kill Isabella, surely. He loves her. I can understand him wanting to kill me, but his Bella? Alice… your vision didn't show that, surely? Edward would never…"

I trailed off, babbling now. Alice sighed.

"Not on his own, no. But I see… manipulation."

Suddenly, I understood. And, for the first time, felt a shiver of fear run through my bloodless veins.

"The Volturi," I sighed wearily. She swallowed, and nodded.

It still did not make sense, though.

"But, why? Bella has a gift, a closed mind, which intrigues and frustrates Aro in equal measures. He would not want her dead, nor Edward. On the contrary, he would rather possess them for what they can offer him. Me, well, I suppose I would be the one he would happily sacrifice, despite the time we spent together. But if that happened, Bella would never cooperate with them. I don't see the logic, do you?"

Alice was quiet for a moment, lost in thought.

"I only saw fragments. Perhaps the aim is not for anyone to actually die," she chimed, after a moment or two. "Perhaps it is a ruse to bring about another possibility."

My mind worked through this theory, and I hit upon the most likely answer swiftly.

"Bella would not stand to see either of us hurt," I said. "And they know I would never kill Edward, even if he was trying to kill me. They need leverage. They need Bella's life to be threatened, to provoke my reaction. Then, if Bella thought that one of us was truly going to die, any offer that the Volturi made her would suddenly seem the only option."

"An option to join them," Alice finished for me.

I turned away, and rubbed my forehead in exasperation. "Goddamn it!"

Slowly, I remembered what Alice had said originally.

"Wait. You said you had seen many outcomes," I said suddenly, whirling back to her. She bit her lip, and closed her eyes. For the first time I noticed how tired she looked. Her visions had made her look drawn before, especially during such times of stress, but never had I seen her look so worn. She looked almost tired of life itself.

"I… they are not good outcomes either," she said softly, eyes still closed. I swallowed.

"I can take it, Alice. Whatever unpleasant things you have seen, they are only several of many other outcomes. I have to know all the possibilities, Alice, _please_…"

She opened her eyes, and surveyed me with great sadness.

"Alright. The outcomes I have seen, other than that one… I see Bella sacrifice herself for you. I see you die. I see Edward die. I see you both die. I see Bella, broken and afraid, I see you in the woods in despair, I see us all, lost and hurting. Nowhere in any of them do I see…"

She paused, looking at me. Each scenario had stung me a thousand times worse than any venom could.

"I don't see a happy ending, Carlisle," she told me in a very small voice. "I'm scared."

She seemed so fragile in that moment, that I embraced her without even thinking about it. She clung to me, and I closed my eyes against the pain.

"It will be alright, Alice. Somehow. It will be alright."

But how could I convince her of that, when I couldn't even convince myself?

**BPOV**

I edged closer to the sweet, sweet scent. I could hear the beating of their hearts, the crunch of their footfalls, the breath as it hissed from their lungs.

I surveyed them from a height, impassively. A man and a woman. I did not recognise them, but it wouldn't have mattered if I had. The thirst was strong…

I crouched on the branch, poised to strike.

Then, an image of Carlisle flashed through my head. I stopped breathing, shutting out the scent.

_No! Bella, what are you doing?_ I asked myself in horror.

I quickly leapt to another tree, moving away from the humans as fast as I could, before I got lost in the burn again.

When I was far enough away, I allowed myself to breathe again. Shock was probably etched across my face. I had come so close…

_So close to disappointing him._

I caught the scent of a herd of deer, and shot after the trail, trying to leave my misery behind me.

**XxX**

I drank from more deer than I needed. I wanted to be completely sated. Beyond sated. I couldn't risk catching the scent of them on the way back and needing their blood all over again.

I closed my eyes for a moment, trying to forgive myself over what I had almost done.

_Almost done._

At least I had not actually done it.

I opened my eyes again, and scrambled backwards in alarm.

A pair of eyes, gazing back at me from the trees. Not animal. Not human.

_Black eyes. Vampire. _

In an instant, they were gone. A chill crept through me. Those eyes… they were cold, unfamiliar… and yet incredibly familiar all at the same time.

I whirled, trying desperately to see where those eyes had gone to…

I crashed into something as hard as stone, and looked up into eyes that were… not what they had been.

"Edward…" I breathed.

He looked worn, and tired. I had expected him to look angry, but he just looked… weary. Resigned. Wrung out.

His eyes, however, were black, and not at all pleasant.

"Bella."

His voice was flat, emotionless. We stood there for some time, simply staring at each other warily, for different reasons. He looked like he wanted very much to say something, but then thought the better of it. More silence ensued.

Finally, his eyes settled on my neck. I knew in an instant what he had noticed, because his fists clenched by his sides and a low snarl erupted from his throat.

He saw that Carlisle had marked me as his own.

A fraction of a second passed, and then he turned and bolted. Towards the house.

"Edward!" I cried, fear lancing through me. _For Carlisle. For us. For the future_.

"Edward, no!"

I was after him immediately, shooting through the trees at a faster pace than I had ever been before. Still, it wasn't fast enough. Not to catch Edward. I kept going forward, and prayed.

**CPOV**

We had been sitting around the table when the vision came. Alice's eyes glassed over, and she spoke the words before she had even properly returned to us.

"He's coming."

I had retreated to my study. I'm not sure why. I think the familiarity calmed me. Alice looked pained when I took that route, and I guessed she had seen us in here, with a not so good outcome.

The shattering of glass told me the time had come. I heard Alice and Jasper cry out, Emmett shout. Then, the door to my study crashed open, Edward in the doorway, eyes blazing.

"Edward…" I began, knowing it was futile to try and talk to him. But I tried anyway.

He lunged at me, flinging his full force into me. Even though I was ready for him, he managed to knock me across the room. My back shattered into the wall, causing the room to shake. More books fell down. More items crashed to the floor, breaking into pieces.

Edward's face was nose to nose with mine. His fists were bunched around my shirt collar, pressing against my neck.

"I should kill you…" he hissed, practically trembling with rage. I went to reply, but then, without warning, he let go of me and retreated back a little. I crashed to the ground at his release, cursing, and eyed him warily.

He was surveying the room, and a smirk spread across his lips.

"I see I don't have to worry about trashing your study," he snapped. "Seems you've already done that yourself, rutting with my _mate_."

He was met with my silence. For once in my life, everything that I wanted to say had left me.

His eyes narrowed as he watched my inner turmoil.

"You know, when you stopped me that night, stopped me from… _hurting_… my Bella, I was glad you were in my life. I was so ashamed with myself, for letting the monster take over me again. I thought that because Bella was a vampire now, I didn't have to control myself anymore. There was no physical danger. It never crossed my mind that she would not want to, because she had been badgering me about it for days."

He paused, giving me a look of sheer hatred.

"I was grateful for you being there. I assumed Alice had seen it, and told you. I felt I had failed you yet again. Failed Carlisle, the fucking pinnacle of righteousness. Ha!"

He swallowed.

"But Alice didn't tell you, did she? You were watching Bella all along. Wanting her for yourself. You didn't stop me because of what I was doing. You stopped me because you wanted to take her for your own."

Finally, I found my voice.

"I stopped you, Edward, because Bella was afraid. Because Bella didn't want to. It had nothing, _nothing_, to do with how I was feeling…"

"Bullshit," Edward spat.

"Oh really? Look into my mind. I can't, and won't, lie to you, Edward. You know that."

He regarded me for a moment, but the hatred did not subside. He revealed nothing as to what he had seen in my head, or what he thought of it.

"How could you do it?" he asked, eventually. "How could you betray me, and Esme? How could you go from loving someone so much, grieving for their loss, their _fresh_ loss, and suddenly decide that you are in love with someone else? _How, Carlisle?_"

I swallowed. "I don't know. All I know is that suddenly, something inside me changed. It was like seeing Isabella for the first time. Only this time, I felt what she was. What we were. How we were supposed to be…"

"You marked her," he interjected, voice laden with accusation and hurt. I nodded.

"Yes."

"Why? To rub it in even more, that she chose to fuck with you like a whore when all along she had belonged to me?"

I was on my feet, snarling, in an instant.

"Don't you _ever_ speak of her that way," I snapped at him. And then, my anger took a hold of me, and I shouted things I probably should not have. At least, not in the manner in which they were said.

"She doesn't belong to you, Edward. She belongs to _me_. We are soul mates. She is my singer, my beloved, my _mate_. We are meant to be. _That_ is why I marked her. That is why I _love_ her. She is _mine, _and she will be for all eternity."

That did it. That shredded any last restraint he had over destroying me.

He slammed into me, grabbing my shirt and hurling me over my desk. I rolled on impact, attempting to leap up and bring him down on the second attack, but of course, he knew what I was going to do. He dodged, and landed a punch square on my jaw, before seizing my arm and twisting until we both heard an almighty crack.

I bit back a yell as pain shot through me.

He offered me no respite, instead taking advantage of my pain and lifting me off my feet, leaping with me and hurling me into a bookcase. His grip remained, and as the wood and books shattered around me, he slammed my head back against a panel of wood, vicious and calculating.

Pain exploded through me, and for a moment, Edward blurred. I felt a crack split across my cheek, and looked up, vision clearing, as Edward's hand connected with my jaw again.

I slumped to the ground, his grip on me finally gone. Vaguely, I heard Alice shriek. _Begging, please, do something, stop him, now…_

I heard Edward laughing softly above me.

"You know," he said, leaning in close. "Even if you were better than me. Even if you were fast enough to make a move without thinking about it. You wouldn't hurt me, would you?"

I stared at him. I didn't need words. He could read me.

He laughed again, his tone bitter, and almost… sad. "Some day, I always knew your compassion would be your downfall, Carlisle."

He rose, moving back across the room, and smiled, almost apologetically.

My thoughts turned to Isabella. My last thoughts, they would comfort me, they would be of her…

"Please," I heard myself say. "Do what you will with me. Just don't hurt her. Don't hurt Isabella…"

He smirked. "I think finishing you off will be punishment enough, don't you?"

He watched the pain play across my face.

"But don't worry. I'll be there to comfort her. I'll be there to finish off what I started the other night."

_No._

My eyes blazed at his words. I couldn't give up. I had to fight. Fight for Isabella.

I tensed, readying myself as he gave a roar and lunged for me.

The impact never came. A shadow flew out of nowhere, knocking him sideways with a horrendous crack.

"Carlisle!"

_Alice._

I struggled to heave myself up, and saw that Emmett had Edward pinned to the floor. He was struggling furiously beneath him. Emmett had a look of pure shock on his face, and I realised that this was the first time he had ever got the better of Edward. Despite Emmett being stronger than his brother, Edward always had the advantage of knowing every move his opponent would make. But clearly, in this case, he had been too focused on dealing with me.

Jasper was kneeling beside them, pouring wave after wave of calmness and submission into Edward with all his might. He looked like he was going to burst with the concentration, not to mention the waves of anger and aggression he must be getting in return from Edward. Alice was staring at him worriedly.

"Carlisle?"

A small voice whispered to my left, and I looked to see my beautiful Isabella crouched beside me, worry and relief colliding in her eyes. She pulled me tightly into an embrace, sobbing invisible tears.

"Oh, thank God, thank God," she mumbled over and over again into my neck. "I tried so hard to catch up with him. I thought I was going to come back to… to…"

I hugged her with my good arm, with all my might.

"You didn't, my sweet. It's okay. I'm alright."

"No, no, you're not."

I felt her hand stroke the crack in my cheek, and I smiled.

"It will be gone in a few moments," I reassured her. The pain from my other arm caused me to wince, however, and I knew I would need Emmett to straighten it out for me later. Bella did not take long to notice the twisted angle of it, and she threw herself against me again, arms wrapped around my torso tightly. She pressed her lips to my cheek, and closed her eyes.

"I love you, Carlisle. I can't live without you, _I can't_."

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Edward shoot a poisonous glance at us. A fresh wave of guilt hit me, along with pity for my son. What had I done? I had caused him such pain, and brought him to this.

"Don't you dare," he spat, the venom in his voice reduced somewhat due to Jasper's influence. "Don't you _DARE_ pity me. You think it's okay because you feel bad? Because you feel guilt? _Go to hell_, Carlisle."

He took advantage of Emmett's temporary lapse in concentration at his words, and sprang out of his grasp. Jasper shot up with him, moving in front of Isabella and I, but Edward held a hand up.

"Don't waste your energy, Jasper," he said in a monotone voice. "I'm going."

And with that, he was gone. Everything else seemed to happen at once… Bella buried herself deeper in my chest. Jasper grabbed Emmett to stop him bounding after Edward. Alice fell to the floor, gripped by another vision. Jasper let go of Emmett to tend to her, holding her gently as she trembled and muttered. The visions were getting stronger, and more troubling, and I ached for her.

I had already guessed what she was going to say when she came around, but still, the words chilled me nonetheless.

"He's gone to them," she said sadly. "He's gone to the Volturi."

**BPOV**

I couldn't watch when Emmett straightened Carlisle's arm out. It was bad enough, standing outside the room, hearing the crack in morbid detail, and the yell that broke through my love's clenched teeth.

No sooner had the cursing left his lips, I was back inside the room like a shot, arms around him. Emmett chuckled, despite the awful mood that hung in the air.

"He's not going to spontaneously combust, Bells," he reassured me. "He's going to be just fine!"

"I don't care," I huffed back at him. "I want to make him feel better."

Carlisle chuckled at that. "You make me feel better just by being here," he whispered, and Emmett groaned.

"Puppy love," he muttered.

"No," I rebuked, with a quick wit that took me by surprise, "That would be if I had fallen for Jacob."

Emmett burst out laughing. Carlisle tried to, but I think it hurt his arm too much, so it subsided into a snort, and another wince.

"Thank you Emmett," I said, looking up suddenly with immense gratitude in my eyes. "Thank you for what you did."

Carlisle had already thanked Emmett, I knew, but I had to thank him too. He had saved Carlisle's life, and I loved him even more than before because of it.

"My wonderful brother," I smiled as he bent down to squeeze me.

"You're welcome, little sis," he grinned.

**CPOV**

An hour passed. Everyone was in a daze. Emmett, Jasper and Alice sat in a huddle, Alice in Jasper's arms, still looking so worn. Bella was nestled into my chest, staring into space. I wanted nothing more than to be alone with her right now, kissing her, claiming her, being inside her… but now was not the time, and we both knew it.

"Alice?"

Bella sat up suddenly, and I looked across to the others. Alice had gone limp, gazing into nothingness as she did when the future came to her.

We shot glances at each other, wondering whether the predictions could get any worse.

"I have a good feeling," Bella whispered to me, squeezing my hand. I wished I could say the same.

Alice came around from the vision. To my surprise, her face brightened, and I felt a glimmer of hope rise within me.

"I saw another outcome," she chimed, and a smile spread broadly across her lips.

_Thank God._

"But it depends on something," she continued, frowning for a moment, as images apparently shuffled themselves through her mind again.

"Depends on what?" I demanded, desperate to know what she had seen. She was silent, lost in her thoughts. I moved over to her, kneeling in front of her.

"Depends on _what_?" I pressed again. Jasper put a steadying hand on my shoulder, and I refrained from reaching out and shaking her.

"On whether Rosalie comes back," came her rather surprising reply.

_**Please review! Was Edward too mean? Will he ever forgive Carlisle? What will happen when he goes to the Volturi? Where is Rosalie, and where does she fit in with all this? Will Jacob show up again and put in his two-penneth? Will Carlisle and Bella ever get to consummate their relationship without being interrupted? Theories and reviews, pretty please with Carlisle on top (and underneath, and spooning, and… oh, sorry, got distracted…!) **_


	12. Chapter 12

_**So sorry for taking longer to update with this chapter! This was actually meant to be a short chapter but it seems my fingers ran away with the keyboard, lol. **_

_**Just wanted to take this opportunity to say a HUGE thank you to everyone who has reviewed, favorited and subscribed to this story so far. It means so much. All the reviews have been amazing, but I just wanted to say an extra special thank you this time around to Keeper of the Covenant. Thank you so much for taking the time to write such amazing in depth reviews each chapter, they truly inspire me and make me think about things I might not have considered before. You rock! **_

_**A brief note about this chapter – I want to point out that I decided to make Jake a little more twisted than he is in the books. I figured that if he were that cut up about Bella and Edward, then being rejected AGAIN for ANOTHER "bloodsucking leech" would seriously mess up his head. So, hence the evil Jake in this chappie! **_

_**I also explained the confrontation with Edward a bit from Carlisle's point of view, as I know some of you were wondering why he didn't put up more of a fight. **_

_**Hope you enjoy! **_

**CHAPTER TWELVE**

**CPOV**

I sat quietly in my study, mind churning over the events of the past few days. Alice had said no more on the subject of Edward and Rosalie, and following her vision everyone had slowly faded away into their own private musings, in different parts of the house.

I had left Bella with Jasper for a while, telling her I needed to see to some things. In truth, I just needed to think, and she saw through my façade, I believe. Bella could read me so easily, it seemed.

She did not seem to mind, however, and curled up next to Jasper willingly, throwing me a small, comforting smile.

I had been sat in here since, amidst the remnants of my study. Once or twice I had attempted to pick up some of the scattered books, but each time I tried, I got lost in my own thoughts and the books dropped heavily to the floor again.

I could still see Edward's face in my mind. Feel the rage, see the hurt. It was eating away at me, the guilt gnawing relentlessly, despite my knowledge that this was the right path for us all.

It did not help me to feel any better. Even though Isabella was clearly my mate, my singer, I still felt badly for what this had done to my son.

There was a myriad of other feelings jumbled up inside me as well. I waited patiently for each one to surface so that I could deal with them, but was surprised by the first one that finally came.

_Shame. _

Not shame for my relationship with Bella, but for the way I had dealt with Edward. Why had I given in so easily? I had already told Alice that despite having no intention of hurting Edward, I planned to fight for my life.

I knew that Edward would be difficult to fight, given his gift. But still. Why did I not try harder? Before he had threatened Isabella, I had allowed myself to be beaten to the floor, willing to let him do whatever he had to do.

I would have left Isabella behind me. How could I have done that to her?

I rubbed my forehead for the hundredth time and sighed. I knew perfectly well why, I just had a hard time dealing with it.

I felt like I deserved to die. For the things I had done to my family, past and present. Everything I had ever done to them was reeling through my mind, from turning them in the first place, to my actions in the past few days. I felt as though I had hurt too many people recently, and consequently, how could I possibly be worthy of Isabella's affection?

I heard Isabella's soothing voice in my head. She would be protesting loudly right now, telling me how wrong I was to think this way. That everything I did was right; for the best.

Perhaps she was right. Perhaps I had done the right thing all along.

Or perhaps not.

Either way, I knew I had to move on from this. I had done what I had done, and that could not be changed. Time to deal with it and move on.

_Time to start living again, Carlisle. _

I pushed the guilt aside and let the pain wash through me, until it had all but seeped out. I forced a smile, and let thoughts of Isabella bring in fresh waves of love and joy, washing away the last remnants of the negative feelings inside me.

I felt stronger than ever, then. I felt as though I had been renewed, ready to face whatever next came our way. Including Edward.

_Whatever his decision…_

Next time, I would not give up the fight so easily.

**JPOV**

_Filthy bloodsucking leech._

I repeated the sentence for the umpteenth time that day. The pack were getting sick of me, but I didn't care. I couldn't deal with this in human form right now. I had to be out here, paws pounding the ground relentlessly. If I was in human form, I think I'd be tearing things apart.

_How could she do this to me? How could she let me love her, and love me back in her own twisted little way, and yet time and time again, find other people… no, other LEECHES, that she deemed better for her than me? _

_- Give it a damn rest, Jake. You're doing my goddamn head in. -_

_Shut up, Leah. _

_- You're doing everyone's head in, Jake, not just hers. –_

_Well you can shut up as well._

Paul went silent, and I waited for someone else to chip in, but they obviously thought the better of it. At least, they did until I had my next thought. I couldn't help myself any longer.

_I'm going to rip his disgusting bloodsucking head off._

_- Oh no you're not. Unless they break the treaty, we don't touch a hair on their heads. –_

I snarled, snapping at the branches that blocked my way as I hurtled on through the woods. I knew damn well I couldn't do anything… yet. Sam didn't need to remind me.

_Technically they did break the damn treaty. _

But thanks to the convenient pact Sam had agreed to when Bella was turned, I couldn't even get him for that. For biting her. Turning her into one of _them_.

I shuddered as I ran, whimpering.

I didn't care that he had mended my broken bones. I didn't care that he had prevented Bella's death.

I just wanted to rip his lecherous throat out.

_- There are other ways to piss off the vamp, Jake. Revenge comes in all forms. –_

_- Leah… - _I heard Sam warn. She went quiet for a while, but decided to ignore him and continue.

- _As I was saying. Revenge comes in all forms_. -

I smiled, baring my fangs, despite myself. I could understand her infernal bitterness now. I could feel her pain. Because I had pain just like hers. Except I think that mine was worse.

- _Don't flatter yourself –_ she snapped. – _Want to hear what I have to say or not?_ –

I sighed, slowing my pace.

_Sure. Go ahead. Not that anything could possibly make me feel any better right now. _

- _Oh, I think it could_. –

I had to admit, she had me intrigued.

- _Charlie_. -

I blinked. _What? What about Charlie?_ How could Charlie make me feel any better?

Then, the pieces started to fall into place.

- _Man, you're slow today, Jake. She really has messed you up. Hell, go give her some just desserts_. -

_Charlie._ He didn't know about… well, any of this. He thought Bella was still in hospital in some city several states away.

What if I told him that Bella wasn't there at all? That she had been at the Cullens' all along?

Even better, what if I told him that, far from being with Edward, which would be pissing him off immensely, she had in fact, ditched the boy for the dad?

I pictured Charlie's rage turning him several shades south of purple. I pictured news getting around town, the good doctor's reputation in tatters.

_And that was just the beginning. _

My jowls stretched into a wide, sharp-toothed grin.

Ah, suddenly life had a purpose again.

**CPOV**

Night had come and gone, bringing with it a bitter wind and a desperate howling, which for some reason had sent a chill through my bones.

Dawn had broken, and the birds were singing in the trees outside our, for once, serene home.

Alice was floating up and down the halls, much happier today. Emmett was engaging Jasper in something suitably competitive.

Me? I was seeking out my Isabella. I was done with my own thoughts. I wanted only to be lost in hers now.

I found her where I had left her, curled up on the sofa. Jasper was long gone, suffering Emmett in his usual good-humoured way. Her eyes were closed, but of course, she was not sleeping.

She opened them as I entered, having heard my approach long before I made it to the doorway. I kept having to remind myself that her hearing was as astute as ours now, if not more so, in her keen newborn state.

She smiled.

"I still can't get used to the idea of not going to sleep at night," she confessed, hugging herself and then stretching.

"Not that I'm complaining. It's pretty amazing, sitting watching the stars for as long as I want to, without getting tired."

I smiled, and moved quickly to sit beside her, putting an arm around her as she snuggled in close to me.

"I bet you know all about the stars," she sighed, kissing my cheek and leaning into my neck, smiling.

"Well, as a matter of fact…" I trailed off with a mock-smug grin. She laughed.

"I'd love it if you would tell me about them sometime."

"Anything for you, my sweet," I murmured into her hair, and she snuggled closer.

"How's the arm?" she asked. To tell the truth, I hadn't even thought about it since Emmett had straightened it out.

"Good as new," I replied, honestly. "I am a vampire, remember?"

We both chuckled. Her eyes were boring into mine, and I felt my breath go still. Sensations were whirling through me. This was as close as I was ever going to get to feeling a beating heart again, that much I knew. I wanted to feel like this every single day for the rest of eternity, and with Isabella, I knew that I would.

_No, damn it, I wanted more._ Right now, I wanted more. I wanted to know her in every way possible. Wanted to feel like I had never felt, in all my 360-odd years.

"Come with me," I whispered, pulling her to her feet. She threw me a questioning look, both curious and excited. And… hopeful. I smiled internally. I had a feeling I knew what she was hoping for, and her hope was going to be rewarded.

I led her outside, my hand squeezing hers.

"Trust me?" I asked, quirking an eyebrow at her. She quirked one back, and grinned.

"Always."

I had a fleeting image in my head of her bare skin against mine, our bodies glittering as we lay entwined, bathed in the rays of the sun. Her lips were on my lips, and our bodies were hard against each other, lost in immeasurable delights.

I blinked, and Bella smiled then, for we never blinked unless humans were present. She had a pretty good idea what I was planning, and the thought put an even bigger grin on her face.

I felt giddy again, and pulled her into a super fast run, before I could lose myself in daydream entirely.

Damn the daydreams. I wanted my Bella to be a reality.

**JPOV**

Charlie looked flustered when he finally answered the door. Possibly due to my incessantly loud, heavy knocking.

What could I say? I was unbearably impatient right now.

"Jacob."

He looked at me, blinking. "Is something wrong?"

"Just had some news I thought you should know about," I replied, keeping an even gaze as I took him in.

He looked tired, worn; gaunt even. The sort of tired and gaunt that worry caused. _Worry and stress._ The kind that only daughters could bring.

Particularly those who ran with bloodsucking leeches.

I returned my attention to him. His eyes had sparked at my words.

"News? About Bella?" he asked, eager to interrogate me now. "Is she okay? Has something happened?"

This questioning was illogical, I knew. Why anyone would have given me news from the hospital before Charlie was anyone's guess. But Charlie was not in his right mind; that much was clear. He was muddled, and worried, and tired.

_All the more likely to boil over with rage when he hears what I have to say._

I almost frightened myself with the ferocity of my bitterness. _Almost._

"She's fine. But there are things that I know, Chief Swan. Things that I think _you_ should know."

He frowned, and took a step back, gesturing for me to go in. I nodded, looking around as I did so, remembering the times that I had been here before.

_In better times, with a better Bella. _

"So."

Charlie looked at me, expectantly. "What news, exactly?"

I blinked, picking over the words in my head, trying to choose the most effective way to begin.

"Well, it has come to my attention that much of what you have been told about Bella's condition is… shall we say… not exactly truthful."

Charlie looked confused, and then angry, and then confused again.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, for starters, I'm surprised that you haven't seen her yet."

"Seen her? She's not in intensive care anymore?"

Charlie looked both hopeful and crushed at the same time, as his emotion over Bella being okay collided with the realisation that people hadn't been telling him everything.

"She's been back for days," I said, watching with interest to see how he reacted. To begin with, the reaction was slow.

"Back? Days? But the accident happened less than two weeks ago," he responded, scratching his head. "You're not making any sense, kid."

I was silent, letting him work things out in his head.

"Back where? Why isn't she here? Why hasn't anyone told me?"

"She's been at the Cullens'," I replied, fighting to hide my smile as he stiffened at the name.

"Doctor Cullen has been looking after her…" I continued, enjoying my dramatic build up. Charlie had no idea where this was going, and I was enjoying every single second, despite feeling sorry for the man standing before me. Always in the dark. _Always._

"What? But… why hasn't he contacted me…?"

Confusion had turned to hurt. I knew how much Charlie liked and respected _Doctor Cullen. _

Oh, when he finds out what he is_ really_ like…

"Are you sure about this, Jacob? Why on earth would Bella be at their house in her condition? Without anyone telling me? How can Doctor Cullen possibly be in a fit state to treat her, treat _anyone_, after losing his wife like that?" he asked, incredulous, and somewhat disbelieving now.

"Why don't you head over there and see for yourself?" I encouraged. He shot me a look. And then…

"_Edward_."

I blinked. Hell, I had almost forgotten about poor old Edward.

_How things change. _

I raised an eyebrow, allowing Charlie the scope to get creative all by his good self.

"I'll bet Edward has something to do with this. I don't trust that boy…"

I couldn't help myself.

"Actually, from what I heard, it seems Bella has left Edward."

Charlie blinked. Several times. His jaw hung open a little, gawping at me.

"Left? _Bella_ has… _left _Edward?"

I nodded.

"After all that pain she went through? After all the stress she went through to get him back?"

"Yup."

Any pleasure that Charlie was getting from this fact was mostly hidden by the shroud of confusion and anger that was still roiling through him. I figured now was the perfect time to bring out the punch line.

"Still no hope for me, though, Chief. Seems Bella must have hit her head pretty hard, because she's into older guys now, so I hear."

Charlie broke out of his shock at the news of Edward, to look at me with a mixture of disbelief and bubbling anger at my phrase "older guys."

"What do you mean?" he demanded. "How can she be dating someone else already? In fact, how can she be _ditching _anybody? She's been at death's door in hospital, surrounded by doctors…"

He trailed off as he put doctors, Bella and Cullens together, before giving me an extremely lethal look, and giving up on logic altogether. "_Who?"_

I tried not to smirk as I let the words fall from my bitter lips.

"Well, last I heard she had ditched poor Eddie and taken up with his newly-bereaved father."

I watched in morbid amusement as Charlie's face changed through several shades of red and purple. I noted the rage, the shock, the horror, as he processed everything I had said, and fitted it all together.

As he realised that his daughter, _his only daughter_, his baby girl, was seeing the so-called respectable Doctor Carlisle Cullen.

A man who, as far as Charlie was concerned, was 17 years her senior. A man with whom she had been staying, for an unspecified number of days, without telling him.

I rejoiced internally. When he got to their house, she would look perfect. Not a scratch on her. The accident would be exposed as what it was. _A lie._

A lie that, as far as Charlie was concerned, had been concocted to cover up an illicit relationship between a 35-year-old, recently widowed doctor and an 18-year-old schoolgirl.

Charlie slammed his fist down on the counter, startling me from my delicious reverie. For a moment I wondered if I had gone a bit too far with the details; he looked like he was going to have a heart attack. Much as I wanted this confrontation, I didn't want anything to happen to Charlie. I went to say something that might calm him down a little, but he seemed to manage that himself, by seizing his gun and marching to the door.

I readied myself to follow him to the Cullens' house, and practically licked my lips in anticipation of the fallout.

Boy, oh boy. This was going to be good.

_**Evil Jacob! What will happen when Charlie arrives at the Cullen residence? You'll have to wait a little longer to find out, as the next chapter returns to some juicy, juicy lemon… Well, at least it will, if you lovely readers click that lovely review button below! Repeat after me – reviews equal naked Carlisle, reviews equal naked Carlisle…**_


	13. Chapter 13

_**Wow! Thank you SO much for all the amazing reviews! Glad you enjoyed evil Jake! The result of his evilness will be revealed in the next chapter, but for now, here is your reward… a sparkling naked Carlisle, and over 3,000 words of pure, unadulterated Bellisle lemony lushness… Enjoy!**_

**CHAPTER THIRTEEN**

**BPOV**

We had crossed miles in a matter of minutes, travelling far beyond the woods, beyond Forks, beyond home. I wasn't quite sure where we had ended up, but to be perfectly honest, the name of our location was the last thing on my mind. All I knew was that it was completely, and utterly, stunning. _Breathtaking. Beyond words._

Not unlike the vampire standing beside me.

We were standing in a meadow. Not Edward's meadow. A _better _meadow. The most beautiful, incredible meadow you could ever imagine.

A stream was gurgling along nearby, and a breeze was twisting its way lazily through the tops of the trees that flanked the long, lush grass, intertwined with wildflowers that went through virtually every colour of the rainbow.

The sun was beaming down on us, from a cloudless sky.

Wordlessly, I turned to face Carlisle.

He was beyond stunning. The sun bounced off him in a million sparkles, glinting like diamonds that both blinded and dazzled me. If vampire sparkle had looked impressive to my human eyes, it looked positively ethereal now. Or perhaps it was just because it was Carlisle.

Truly, he was a god. A divine creature, bound to Earth for all these years, so that he could be mine.

He was looking at me in a way that suggested he was thinking exactly the same thing about me, much as I would have liked to disagree with him. However, looking down at myself, I confess I was impressed.

"My goddess," he breathed, drinking me in. "My beautiful, beautiful, goddess Isabella."

He was inches from me in a heartbeat.

"May I worship you, oh beautiful goddess?" he asked suggestively with a wink, trailing his fingers down my sides and making me ache with desire for him.

_As if I hadn't been already!_

"You may, oh gorgeous one," I grinned, putting my hand up to his face before moving up and running my fingers through his golden hair.

Our lips collided and his arms were around me in an instant, holding me tightly.

"Carlisle…" I began, but was silenced by his mouth crushing mine. His hands moved down my back and onto my hips, then slid back up until they were clasping my face. He broke the kiss slowly, moving back, eyes closed, a smile on his lips.

"I am glad we were interrupted in my study," he said softly, eyes opening after a while. They were the colour of honeycomb.

I raised an eyebrow. "Oh? And why is that?" I asked.

"Because I would not have been a gentleman. I would have been… rather more forceful than I would have liked, for our first time. For _your_ first time."

I tried to bite back a laugh but failed miserably.

"Carlisle…" I grinned. "I rather more like the sound of the latter!"

His eyes were darkening, and he smiled in response.

"I know… and you will know that side of me, I promise…"

He trailed his fingers over my temples, tucking stray locks of hair behind my ears, moving them down to the sides of my neck.

"Mmmmm…"

"However, _I_ rather think that you will thank me for what is to come next…"

I had not the presence of mind to respond, for his eyes had turned black, his hands were moving impossibly fast across my skin, my back, my sides… and his lips were on mine again, his tongue slipping inside my mouth and teasing me relentlessly.

"Carlisle…" I breathed, gasping as his tongue left mine and his mouth moved further down to my neck, sending shivers throughout my body. Although he was less urgent than he had been in the study, there was something equally incredible about what he was doing now. It was slower, but sensual… arousing… unbelievably delicious.

Every action was filled with love.

His hands cupped my face as he kissed every inch of my neck, my collarbone, and my shoulders, before gently but firmly tugging on my shirt, his vampire strength enough to rip it away with one soft motion. I tried to protest, my mind wondering for a moment what on earth I was supposed to wear on the way back, but such trivial matters were soon forgotten when his lips and tongue found their way to the tops of my breasts.

"Isabella…" he moaned into me, nose stroking between them as he buried his face in my chest. I felt my hands reach out and grab at his shirt, balling the material into my fists and pulling until I heard the material shredding.

_I loved being a vampire._

I let the remains of his shirt fall to the ground and slid my hands over his glorious body, relishing the muscle in his strong arms and the delicious contours of his gorgeous chest. His breath caught with each new and unexpected movement that I made, and each time he returned to my skin with increased fervour.

I felt my bra fall to the ground – _when did he… never mind. _I arched my back in delight as his mouth found a nipple, and clung to him desperately as he began to nibble and suck, letting out a cry of ecstasy.

I was so lost in the sensations of him worshipping my breasts with his tongue, that I barely realised when he slid my jeans and panties off my hips in one swift movement. Feeling decidedly underdressed compared to him, I composed myself enough to relieve him of his remaining clothes as well. Mustering every ounce of strength I could manage, I pulled back a little, almost whimpering as my breasts escaped his touch, and gazed at him.

He tried to move with me and continue his heavenly worship, but I smiled and held him back gently.

"I want to look at you," I said lustily, my eyes moving over his naked, sparkling form.

_Oh. My. God. _

If we were damned, and truly had no souls, I didn't care. An eternity of this was far better than Heaven.

I felt my eyes melt to blackness, pure lust racing through my bloodless veins. Carlisle's expression mirrored my own, lost to immeasurable desire and longing.

"You… you…" I stammered, words failing. He grinned, and if I had been human I think I might have fainted there and then as he growled and pulled me to him with a look of pure love.

"Thank you," he whispered teasingly, knowing what I wanted to express even if I could not find the words. "You are indescribable too, Isabella. Beyond beautiful. Beyond everything I could ever have wished for."

I clung to him, desperate now to feel him inside me. But he had other plans. Slowly he pushed me to the ground, keeping me in his arms the entire time, lips moving over every inch of my body. I whimpered as his fingers found my core, probing the wetness gently at first, then more forcefully.

"_Oh,_ oh yes…"

He slid them inside me, and although my eyes were closed in pure ecstasy, I could feel his intense gaze looking down at me as he pleasured me, watching my every reaction. My hips bucked against his hand, and he began to rub me with his thumb, while his fingers thrust deeper.

My climax hit me out of nowhere; causing me to scream and buck over and over, body shaking from the unbelievable pleasure that radiated throughout me. But before I could even gather my senses, I felt a new sensation pressing against me, and then something wet sliding inside my wetness.

Oh God.

His tongue probed me, flicking and gliding as I moaned and writhed against his face.

"Car_lisle_…" I screeched, breath hitching in the middle of his name. If I was alive right now I was sure his actions would kill me from a heart attack at the incredible pressure and sensations he was causing. I felt him smile against me, and he thrust his tongue deeper, alternating with a sucking motion that almost drove me over the edge again. But he was determined to prolong my pleasure; stopping and slowing each time I reached the precipice, before pushing me towards it once again.

"Carlisle… please… I can't take any more…" I pleaded, voice thick with desire and an ache to find release. "Please…"

"Please what?" I heard him ask lustily, before pushing his tongue inside me again.

"Please… let me…" I stuttered.

"Please let you what?" he pressed. I felt my arousal soar to even greater heights as I realised Carlisle wanted to talk dirty!

"Please… make me come..." I begged, grinding my core against his nose and chin.

"And then what do you want me to do?" he asked. I felt like crushing him with my thighs in frustration.

"I want you inside me…" I replied, but that was not good enough.

"Doing what?" he demanded, husky and less patient now.

"Make… making love to me…" I stammered, crying out as his tongue began darting in and out in unbearable motions.

"Soft and slow?" he pressed.

"N…n… no..." I moaned. "Hard and… ahhh! Hard and f…f…fast!"

"So what you _really _want me to do is…"

"_Carlisle_!" I screamed, thrashing in unbearable agony now.

"What do you want me to do to you Isabella?" he growled, nipping at my bud ever so gently with his teeth.

"_Fuck_ me!" I screamed, and my words sent his tongue plunging inside me in a frenzy; pushing me over the edge where I so, so wanted to go…

"Fuck me Carlisle, please, oh please, oh God, _fuck me_!"

I came with wave after wave of unbelievable ecstasy flooding through me, my body bucking and writhing as if possessed. He snarled in pleasure, lapping up my wetness as I came, before slowly climbing his way up my body, tongue sliding over my skin, while I still shuddered and moaned from my second orgasm. He licked my thighs, my stomach, my breasts, my neck…

Until he reached my face, his body hovering over mine, touching, but not quite touching.

"Good girl," he praised, eyes filled with desire. "Now, be an even better girl for me. Open wide for me, Isabella…"

I spread my legs at once, eyes locked into his.

"Yes, Doctor Cullen," I said in as sultry a voice as I could manage, given that I was still reeling from the effects of where his tongue had been. Where his huge, hard erection was pressing, right now.

He growled at my words, pressing himself down against me and grinding teasingly into my core. I shuddered and gasped.

"So much for being a gentleman, _Doctor_," I mock-chided him. His eyes glittered and a broad smile spread across his lips.

"You bring out the animal in me," he whispered into my ear. "Besides… I think you are right. You like it this way. You naughty, _naughty _girl, Isabella…"

"Please," I whispered. "Please, Doctor Cullen. Take me. Hard. _Fuck me, Doctor_!"

He was edging closer and closer to that last thread of control, and I was determined to cut it loose. With a primal growl, he plunged his face into my neck and began sucking and biting in exquisite abandon. I felt him pushing against me, angling his tip at my entrance. It caused an unfathomable ache to grow and spread throughout me, and I knew I had to have him inside me right now, or else I would go insane.

He pushed a little more, and I felt him begin to enter me. Slowly_, excruciatingly slowly_, he eased himself inside me. My head reeled and my body flooded with a primal, electric energy, waves of pleasure rushing through me as he pushed himself all the way in. A brief flash of pain subsided into exquisite beauty, as we merged together as one.

"Oh, God, Carlisle!" I gasped. He felt incredible inside me. I was high on waves of bliss, and he hadn't even begun moving yet. He felt so big, filling every inch of me, as if he was made precisely for this. _For me._

For a moment, he didn't move. I looked down, trying to see what he was doing. He was still buried in my neck, but I could just make out the profile of his face. His eyes were closed in abject bliss, a smile of satisfaction and wonder on his lips.

"Isabella…"

He said my name so softly, I would not have heard it had I not been a vampire. I was glad that I was, for he said it with such reverence and love, it made me feel dizzy.

His eyes snapped open and he gazed up at me, losing himself in my eyes for a moment.

"Thank you," he said, simply, before capturing my mouth with his and pulling himself almost all the way out of me, and then pushing all the way back in again, and out, and in, and…

_Ohhhhhhhhhhh._

The control had not quite gone altogether. He had been caught up in a wave of love again, and now, as we moved against each other in joyous abandon, all thought of dirty words were forgotten as we lost ourselves in the feeling, the sensation, the ecstasy, of making love to one another. He worshipped me with his mouth and his hands, all the while pumping steadily inside me, making me giddy and wet and incoherent.

After a while, my breath began to come in ragged gasps, and I felt the most incredible feeling bubbling inside me. Carlisle sensed it, and began to move inside me more urgently. Harder. Faster.

_Oh yes. _

Our lovemaking turned to something more feral. Carlisle bit down on my neck, his hands pinching my skin hard as he struggled to keep control. The pressure that was building inside of me was unbearable now. I tensed as I felt the incredible feeling build, and I honestly thought my heart would burst, even though it had no function any more.

"Relax," I vaguely heard him sigh into my ear. "Let go, my beautiful Bella."

I tried, but the feeling was so intense. I gasped and writhed. He moved his tongue over my neck and along my jawline, before pushing it into my mouth and curling it around mine.

This distracted me momentarily, and he smiled into our intense kiss, breaking it to look at me with pure love in his eyes.

"Come for me, Isabella," he said, and he thrust even harder than before. I threw my head back and moaned.

"_Carlisle_!"

I met his thrusts with renewed abandon, letting the sensations take me over and carry me away, feeling the tension ebb out of me and a wave of pleasure start to set fire to my frozen insides.

"Bella… oh God, Isabella…"

"Carlisle… oh yes… oh yes, _yes_…"

Our thrusting reached a crescendo, and suddenly my peak ripped through me, sending bolt after bolt of sheer pleasure charging through my body. I screamed out Carlisle's name over and over, and I felt him tense in my arms as he too came, with a passionate growl and then a long moan, before he collapsed onto me, gasping out my name.

We clung to one another for what seemed like an age, every inch of our bodies touching. My mind was up in the sky somewhere; I could not manage one single coherent thought.

Slowly, some semblance of reality returned to me. Carlisle stirred against me, his nose nuzzling my cheek and his lips brushing my jaw. I smiled. A ridiculous, smug, blissfully goofy smile.

Nothing, not one single moment of my wildest dreams and fantasies, could compare to this. Making love to Carlisle was beyond anything I could have imagined. It was pure, sheer heaven. He was everything, _the only thing_, I ever wanted, for the rest of my existence. Even with eternity on our side, I wasn't sure I would ever be able to get enough of him.

"I love you, Isabella Swan," he sighed. "More than anything. More than life."

"I love you more than anything, too," I responded, turning so that I could look into his eyes. "You are everything to me, Carlisle. I can't exist without you, not now. I am yours, for all eternity."

The look of sheer joy on his face would have brought tears to my eyes, had they been capable of still crying. He pulled me close, and we lay there for a little longer, bathed in the afterglow of our love, our union.

After a time, Carlisle propped himself up on one elbow, toying with my hair as he gazed down at me, and smiled.

"We should get moving soon," he said gently. I frowned.

"I'm not sure I want this to end just yet…" I protested teasingly, pouting at him. He smiled.

"I want nothing more than to ravish you here again and again, my devilish girl, but there are humans approaching. We have fifteen minutes, before they stumble across two stark naked, sparkling vampires…"

He raised an eyebrow and threw me a very serious look.

"You wouldn't want to give them a heart attack, now would you, Isabella?"

I smiled despite myself.

"I'd risk it, for more of you," I grumbled, but allowed myself to be pulled to my feet nonetheless. Carlisle crushed his lips against mine again, and I moaned, feeling myself pressed up against a tree and his hands roaming all over my skin…

"Shit!" he cussed, forcing himself to break away from me. "Damned humans!"

I giggled. "How very inconsiderate of them."

Suddenly, I remembered how we had ripped our clothes from each other.

"Uh, Carlisle?" I asked, a look of concern flickering across my face. "Given our earlier… _fervour_… I believe we are going to have to get ourselves home… like _this_!"

He chuckled, his mirth increasing as he noted my embarrassment. At least I couldn't blush anymore.

"Don't worry," he smiled. "Aside from the fact that we could run all the way home _and_ sneak into the house without even my family noticing, I did have the presence of mind to pack some extra clothing… just in case."

A wave of relief washed through me as he stooped to retrieve his small pack, pulling a cotton dress out for me and a shirt and pair of trousers for him. I wrinkled my brow in slight disapproval at the impracticality of the dress, but he threw me a knowing smile and I relented.

"You look so beautiful in a pretty dress," he murmured, placating me. I slipped it on, and watched regretfully as he too dressed. I began counting the minutes and hours until I would get to see his glorious naked form again…

He captured me in a heavenly kiss, before taking my hand and tugging me into the beginnings of another breathtaking vampire run.

"Let's stop halfway," I managed to say before we picked up speed. "I fancy a romantic stroll home, human-speed."

"That sounds like a wonderful idea," he replied, before pinching my bottom and flashing ahead of me with a 'catch me if you can' grin.

I hesitated for a fraction of a second, before laughing my new, chiming, vampire laugh and flying after him, determined to pay him back with some pinching of my own.

As the trees flew by, my entire being rejoiced.

_It had finally happened. Carlisle Cullen was completely, and utterly, mine! _

And nothing, absolutely _nothing_, was going to take him away from me.

_**Please review! **_


	14. Chapter 14

_**Wow! Thank you all once again for your amazing reviews, they mean so much! Every single one puts a big smile on my face! **_

_**Ok, so the confrontation with Charlie has ended up way longer than I originally intended, because APOV ran way with me, so I have split it into more than one chapter. Therefore, this one is quite short, but the next one will be up either later on today or tomorrow morning! **_

**CHAPTER FOURTEEN**

**APOV**

"Jazz, will you please do something to cheer Emmett up?" I murmured to my love as we sat at the table, gazing at our somewhat forlorn brother. I smiled as he sent a wave of positivity towards him, but Emmett looked more annoyed than anything.

"Rosalie was only doing what she thought best," Jasper said after a while. "I'm sure she's coming back soon. Don't worry."

Emmett's expression softened a little.

"Yeah, I know. Just bugs me how she took off without telling anyone. And that she's blocking her decisions on purpose, so Alice can't see. I just hope Ed's not stringing her along. After what he did…"

There was a brief silence. We all knew what Edward had tried to do to Bella, however innocent it had started out. I had seen it, and it still made me shiver. Emmett had been fit to go after Edward and rip at least one of his arms off after I told him.

_What had become of us? _

We still loved Edward, he was our brother, despite what he had done to Bella, and despite what he had tried to do to Carlisle. We could forgive him that; we understood his pain. Misreading Bella was another matter entirely, but I didn't doubt that at the time, he was filled with remorse for what he had… almost done.

"If only I had been able to tell Rosalie what happened before she left…" I sighed. "She would never have gone after him if she knew."

"Maybe it is for the best," Jasper said. "Perhaps it was meant to be. After all, you said according to your vision, Rosalie's decision to come home or not is pivotal in this all having a happy outcome."

"I'm going with that theory," Emmett said, sounding more chipper. "Makes me feel better for now, anyhow."

He rose. "I'm going for a hunt. Anyone?"

We shook our heads in unison. I was not in the mood; Jasper had already hunted. I threw Emmett a positive smile and watched him disappear outside.

Jasper squeezed my hand. "You okay, darlin'?" he murmured. I nodded, although a slight frown was creasing my brow.

"Yeah. It's just… I feel like something is going to happen, but I can't see what it is."

"Have you tried looking, then?"

"Yes. My visions had gone quiet today, and then I got this weird feeling. So I took a look ahead, but saw nothing."

"How about now?"

I concentrated and went into my zone, searching my mind for something of the future.

"Oh," I said after a while. Jasper raised an eyebrow as he felt a brief spasm of both amusement and embarrassment emanate from me.

"Bella and Carlisle?" he questioned with a grin.

"Yeah. Let's just say they are… consummating their relationship, right now."

"Good job Emmett's not here to hear you say that," Jasper chuckled.

Seconds later, there was a loud bang, as Emmett came crashing back into the house, like a (vampire?) bat out of hell.

"Emmett, what the hell…?" I trailed off as I saw the expression on his face.

"What is it?" Jasper asked. I felt suddenly uneasy. What could have happened, that I had not foreseen?

"Pops is coming!" he hissed, a mild look of panic in his eyes. We both gave him a blank look.

"_Bella's_ Pop!" he exclaimed. "He's on his way here, and _boy_ is he sore about something."

"What?" I replied, shocked. "Does he know Bella is here? But… how? How… how could I not have seen…?"

"Because Bella's pet dog is with him," a voice said from the doorway. We all turned in unison, and despite the situation, I let out a small squeal.

"Rosalie!"

She disappeared from view momentarily as Emmett engulfed her in a huge embrace.

"Don't you ever run off like that again," he scolded fondly. She wriggled out of his grasp and gave him a playful smack.

"I'll run off whenever the hell I like," she rebuked, but I could tell she was glad to be reunited with him. A quick glance at Jasper's brief smile confirmed this.

"Where have you…" Emmett began, but she hushed him.

"No time for that now. They're almost here, and Charlie's after Carlisle's blood, so to speak…"

"How long?" I asked, frustrated. I hated working blind. _Damn that dog!_

"About four minutes. Fido told him everything. Well, _almost_ everything. He knows that Bella is here, and that she left Edward for Carlisle. To say he is pretty mad would be an understatement."

_Shit!_

"But… but he can't see Bella! What if she loses control?" Emmett said, voicing all our fears.

"Her control has been strong so far," Jasper said softly. "But in a stressful situation like this promises to be, I can't see it holding. Not in a newborn."

"Where are they?" Rosalie asked, voice suddenly cold. I remembered my vision.

"Uh, they're… out… in a meadow…" I said, and her face crinkled into one of disgust.

"Oh God," she sighed. "Please. Spare me the details."

I grappled for my cell and pressed the speed dial for Carlisle.

_Please pick up. Please pick up._

No one answered.

"_For God's sake Carlisle, stop screwing around and pick up!"_ I hissed at the phone, not realising the double entendre until I had spoken the words. Rosalie looked like she wanted to be sick.

"Looks like we get to be the welcome party, then," said Emmett hastily, as we heard the screech of Charlie's tyres approaching.

I let the phone ring some more, but Carlisle was either oblivious to it or ignoring me.

I wanted to run. I wanted to rush across the miles and find them; warn them. But it was too late. Charlie and Jacob were here.

Charlie was hammering his fist against the door.

_Stay calm. _

Jasper was radiating it even as I thought the words.

I couldn't see them. I had no idea where they were. Their future was tied up with Charlie and Jacob now, and consequently I could see nothing.

Charlie was hollering now, yelling something about Bella. He hammered on the door again.

"Come out here and face me, Cullen, or so help me God!"

Emmett opened the door. Charlie froze, his fist in midair as he was preparing to smash it against the door again. He momentarily shrank back – everyone did that when faced unexpectedly with Emmett and his stature – but quickly recovered himself.

"Chief Swan?" Emmett questioned politely. "Is everything alright?"

"No, it damn well isn't!" Charlie yelled. "I want to know the truth. Is Bella here? I want to see her. I want to know what secrets your family is keeping from me!"

_Oh, if only he knew. _

I suddenly realised that we had not agreed upon a strategy. What were we going to tell him? That Bella was not here, and risk her turning up in the middle of everything?

Jasper shot a glance at me and mouthed, "_Stall."_ So I stepped forward, frantically putting words together in my head.

"Chief Swan…" Emmett was trying to butt in, but Charlie was in full rage.

"Why does Jacob seem to think she is here? Where is she? I want to talk to Doctor Cullen, now."

"Our father is grieving for our mother," Rosalie hissed, and Jacob snorted.

"Not what I heard, blondie."

"Shut your face, you stupid little pup!" she retorted. Charlie stepped in between.

"I want to see my daughter," he said, in a scarily calm voice.

"She's not…" Emmett went to say, but Jacob cut in.

"She's here. I know she is. She came to see me."

"I want to know what the hell is going on!" Charlie yelled, voice raised again. "And I want to know what the hell Doctor Cullen has been doing with her!"

He started to push Emmett out of the way, or at least try to. Emmett allowed himself to be moved slightly, so as not to hurt Charlie.

"Let me in!"

"Charlie!"

I stepped forward, raising my voice. He looked at me in surprise, and I hoped that his fondness for me would calm him down, at least a little. I stepped outside the door, Jasper following me. Now we were all outside, in some bizarre kind of face-off.

"Please, Charlie, calm down," I pleaded.

"Is Bella here or not, Alice?" he demanded. "Let me in. I want to see her if she's here. I want to talk to your father. _Now_."

"No, you need to calm down first," I replied, momentarily distracted by a second heated conversation going on between Jacob and Rosalie.

"Do you have _any _idea what you have done?" she was hissing furiously at him, too low for Charlie to hear. "If she comes face to face with Charlie she could kill him. She's a _newborn_, her thirst is overwhelming."

"I'm sure he'll be fine. After all, the only thing she's thirsting over right now is your _daddy_."

Rosalie snarled and went to hit the dog in the face, but Jasper caught her hand before she could.

"After all he did for you," I heard Jasper say in a strained voice, "You can't show him a little more _respect_?"

"Not when he's screwing with the girl I love, in every freaking sense of the word, no!" Jacob bit back.

My mind absorbed this all in a matter of seconds, before it was brought abruptly back to Charlie. Telling him to calm down was evidently not a good thing to say, because he was now looking at me like he wanted to strangle me.

"Stop keeping me in the dark!" he snapped. "Just _tell_ me, Alice."

Suddenly, his face looked pained.

"Is it true? Is she here? Is she… _with_… Carlisle?"

I opened my mouth to say something, but my gaze shifted over his shoulder, and all the words fell out of my head.

_Because then, I saw them. _

They materialised out of nowhere, oblivious to everything as they walked towards the house. Carlisle's head was bowed to the side, resting close to Bella's as if sharing some private thought without actually speaking. He had a faraway look in his eyes and a ridiculous smile on his face. He looked… young again. He looked his true age of twenty-three, instead of his thirty-five-year-old façade, as if the weight of over three hundred years of living had been lifted from him. Bella wasn't much better. She looked like the cat who had got the cream. If they had been human, they would be flushed from head to foot. Carlisle's shirt was crumpled and half unbuttoned, and his hand was skimming the bottom of Bella's equally crumpled short cotton dress.

In a nutshell, they couldn't have looked more incriminatingly giddy and post-coital if they tried.

_Oh God. _

If this had been any other scenario, I would have been jumping for joy and pestering Bella about weddings. But it was not any other scenario. It was this one, and it had the potential to end badly. _Very badly._

_Damn you, dog, for I cannot See! _

Nervously, I refocused my gaze on Charlie. I knew then that I had been looking too long. He had turned to see what I was looking at, and so had everyone else. Jacob had a look of pure hatred on his face.

I glanced back at Charlie. The first thing I noted was his hand - if he gripped his gun any harder, he may well have shattered it, vampire-style.

Reluctantly, I edged around him to see the look on his face.

He looked numb. Shocked. Frozen.

While I didn't doubt for a moment that he had wholeheartedly believed the dog's tale of Bella being here rather than the hospital, I don't think he had truly believed what he had been told about Bella and Carlisle. Until now.

Until he saw… _that._

I silently cursed them for choosing this morning of all mornings to consummate their union, much as the idea brought joy to my heart. And then, I cursed the dog more, for blocking me from seeing this happening.

I felt Jasper send another wave of calm towards Charlie, but it didn't seem to have any effect. If anything, he gripped the gun harder, and took one step forward.

Despite ourselves, all four of us drew in a big breath, and waited for the fallout to begin.

_**Please review! Feedback means more of Carlisle on his back! ;)**_


	15. Chapter 15

_**As always, thank you SO much for the wonderful reviews! I have really enjoyed reading your theories on what will happen next, and I am so glad that you are enjoying the tale. It means so much that the drama chapters are as popular as the lemons, because that means you guys are really into the story. So thank you again! SO sorry, I know I promised this by yesterday, but I was overtaken by Mummy Duties and just didn't get time. Hope it was worth the wait!**_

**CHAPTER FIFTEEN**

**BPOV**

We should have sensed him sooner.

We should have noticed the scent.

But we were too wrapped up in each other until it was too late. We had slowed to a human pace as we approached the house, relaxing as I slipped my hand into Carlisle's. Anyone who saw us would have taken us for a normal couple out for a romantic stroll. And maybe even smiled a little, as they realised what our somewhat dishevelled look meant we had been doing.

I snuck a glance at my gorgeous vampire, and couldn't help but smile. He looked so un-Carlisle right now. His hair was a mess, his shirt half undone, and his clothes crumpled as hell. And he had a permanent giddy smile on his face, which spoke equal volumes about what we had just been up to.

But then, I was one to talk. I looked just as bad.

My second glance caught him sneaking a look in return. I grinned, and our bodies moved closer, knocking against each other as we walked. His hand left mine and moved around me, lightly touching my back, trailing down to my backside, before coming to a rest at the hem of my dress, toying with it playfully.

His cell rang out, and he ignored it. A moment later, it rang again. I looked at him, but he simply inclined his head towards me, nuzzling my neck.

I guess Carlisle was too used to the scent of humans to notice anything amiss, or to even notice the scent of someone familiar, when he was so wrapped up in me. That, and the fact that we had scarcely been breathing all the way here. We were too lost in thought.

But as we came into view of the house, something slowly crept its way into my nostrils. I tensed. Then it hit me.

_Human._

No sooner had the realisation registered in my mind, I was overwhelmed with another, altogether too familiar scent.

_Disgusting, like wet dog…_

Jacob?

I looked up, and if my heart had been beating, it would have stopped right there and then.

_Fuck. Oh fuck, fuck, fuck! _

Charlie and Jacob, looking mad as hell.

Everyone staring at us. Including Rosalie. Oh, she was back! Also looking mad as hell.

Alice, looking frantic, cross and half-amused all at the same time.

_Jesus Christ, Jacob Black, what the hell have you done now?_

I stopped dead. Carlisle started, stopping with me.

"Charlie," was all I said, in a very small voice. Carlisle's head flew up, and it was his turn to tense.

"Stay calm," he told me, after a moment, and pushed me forward with a slight tap on my back. We moved further apart, for all the good that would do us. I knew immediately that Jacob had told him something. And Charlie had seen us already. He had to know. We had been too obvious.

We reached the front of the house and stood gazing up the steps in a nervous silence. Charlie looked down at me, speechless for a moment. I began to calculate the scale of his rage, and then swiftly decided not to bother, because he was slowly turning a very not-so-good shade of red.

"What the _hell_ is going on?" he managed to splutter out. "For the past couple of weeks I have been frantic with worry because _you_," he gestured at me wildly, "Are supposed to be at death's door in some freaking hospital miles away!"

"Dad," I began, but he cut me off.

"Why the lies? Why not tell me that you're back, and you're okay?"

He was focusing his angry stare mainly on Carlisle, but he glanced at me briefly enough to not yet notice the difference in me, but know that I looked like I had never been injured in the first place.

"Jesus Christ, Bella, you weren't even _in_ an accident, were you? Look at you! You're absolutely peach perfect!"

He came flying down the steps. In the background, I could see Jake standing with his arms folded, grinning.

_Bastard wolf! I thought you were my friend. _

It was then that I noticed his gun. Because in the next instant he had it pressed up against Carlisle's chest. I felt a defensive growl rise to the back of my throat, and it took all I had to fight it back down again.

_Act human, Bella, act human. No matter what happens, act human. Ignore the blood. Ignore the scent. You can do this…_

A wave of relaxation washed over me, followed by steady resolve, and I shot a thankful glance at Jasper.

"What the hell have you been doing with my daughter?" Charlie hissed. "Why the lies, the pretence? Was it all a big cover story, so you could screw around with my little girl?"

"Charlie, please…" Carlisle replied in an astoundingly calm voice. "Calm down. It was never my intention to…"

"To what? Start up an affair with a young girl half your age? I suppose your wife isn't really dead, either. What, did she leave when she found out? Or maybe you threw her out so you could move my daughter in?"

"Dad!" I exclaimed. "Please! Esme _is _dead."

Charlie pursed his lips and frowned briefly.

"My condolences. Not that you seem to need them. Wife fresh in her grave and… this?"

My head was spinning. What we were supposed to tell him? That I had been injured, mortally so, and Carlisle had brought me back to life, just not in the living sense? That I was hidden out here because I was a vampire now, and posed a significant threat to him and the rest of Forks until I grew used to the scent of their blood?

Poor Charlie. Of course, this seemed obscene. How could he possibly understand Carlisle and I, unless he knew of vampires, and that when they found their true mate, they just knew?

"Charlie, please. I know this must seem… very strange, and wrong, to you…" Carlisle began, edging back a little from the barrel of Charlie's gun. "And it is something that is not easy to explain, or justify. But please, let me try…"

"Yeah, good luck with that one," snorted Jacob, and I had to fight to stop myself from flying up the steps and throttling him.

"Shut up, Jake," I snapped, fury coursing through me. "You have no idea how much I _hate _you right now."

He flinched a little at that, but showed nothing on his face, and then simply shrugged.

"I'm ashamed of you, Bella," Charlie said, turning to face me. "Deceiving me like this, in such a cruel lie! And then hating your best friend, for what? Telling the truth? Exposing this sick scenario before it's too late?"

He paused, then, blinking at me.

I tried to look as human as I possibly could. But there was nothing I could do about the ethereality of my being. The beauty, the lure, the enchantment. Least of all, the eyes.

"Bella…?" he said, voice down to a whisper, looking at me as if I suddenly had two heads. He looked unsure, and then afraid. And then angry again.

"What has he done to you?" he demanded. I swallowed.

"Nothing, dad. I know I look a little different, but it's okay. You don't need to worry about it."

_Blood. Delicious blood… No, I don't need it! _

"What the hell has happened to your eyes?"

"Contacts," I spluttered, saying the first thing that came into my head. "For a party. Just… getting used to them…"

He wasn't buying it. Sometimes I really wished my dad wasn't a cop. And I sure as hell wished that my appalling lying had been turned perfect like everything else. Alas, it was as unconvincing as ever.

"Shit, Bells, you look different, you sound different… you _are _different…"

Charlie looked down for a moment, as if thinking out his next words, or move. He scuffed his feet in the dirt, then paced up and down, shaking his head a little. When he looked up again from several feet away, he looked sad, and it hurt me.

"So," he said, voice hard as stone. "There's been no denial on your part. Or _yours_."

He spat out the last word, eying Carlisle with disgust. "So it's true, then, what the kid says? You left Edward, for _him_?"

I felt like the world was slipping away from me. I didn't know what to do or say anymore. There was no choice but to tell the truth, but how much of the truth could I safely tell?

I nodded. "Yes. I love him, Dad."

_Wrong choice._

"You bastard," Charlie hissed, and took aim at Carlisle, shooting a stream of bullets towards his feet. He wasn't aiming to kill, but still. It scared the hell out of me, even though he couldn't physically hurt Carlisle.

"Dad!" I shrieked, but Carlisle played along, jumping back with a look of alarm as the bullets hit the dirt.

Emmett and Jasper took a step towards Charlie, and he swung the gun around, adrenalin taking over.

"How _dare_ you mess around with my little girl!" he shouted, looking back at my love with malice. "If you think you can play around with her to make yourself feel better after losing your wife, then you can just…"

"I am _not_ playing around," Carlisle growled, finally snapping a little. "I_ love_ Bella, Charlie. I love her with all my heart. I am _not_ in this to hurt her."

"Dad _please_…" I added, stepping forward a little. "Please, just _calm down_ and let's talk about this. I love Carlisle. I know it all seems sudden to you but there is reasoning behind it, I promise. Carlisle means everything to me, _everything_."

There was panic in my voice, now, and not just because of what Charlie was saying. With each increased beat of his heart, every extra ounce of rage that pumped his blood that little bit faster, I could feel my resolve slipping slightly.

The scent of Charlie's blood was growing ever stronger, and my throat was starting to burn. I felt Jasper flash a glance at me and hit me with a wave of calm, but it made no difference. I half-closed my eyes in pain, and tried to remain focused.

Charlie took a step towards me.

"What about Edward? Two weeks ago you were besotted with Edward! And yet now you're madly in love with his father? It makes no sense, Isabella Swan, and I'm not buying!"

"Two weeks ago you were in love with me, too," I heard Jake mutter, low enough that Charlie wouldn't hear. But Carlisle heard, and he growled softly in the back of his throat.

I closed my eyes, and took a deep breath, the result of which almost knocked me down, so strong was Charlie's enticing scent now. I steeled myself, and opened my mouth to speak. To talk now was the only way I was going to be able to distract myself enough.

"Dad," I said, eyes open again. I looked at him, hard, willing him not to interrupt me. His mouth set in a hard, obstinate line, but it remained closed.

"I know that this all seems… crazy. And that you must be hurting so bad because of what you think is happening here. But please, listen to me. There _was_ an accident. Not quite the same kind that you were told about but… I _was_ injured. I_ did_ nearly die. Carlisle saved my life."

Jake gave a snort of derision, and muttered something about destroying it rather than saving it.

"Shut up, Jake," I hissed, for the second time. "As if you can stand there and judge, making out you're the good guy in all this. You were there. You know as well as anyone else what really happened. _You_ lied to Charlie too."

Charlie whirled on Jake.

"It that true?" he demanded. Jake looked momentarily thrown, and I did a celebratory dance in my head. Even Rosalie looked amused.

_Take that, wolf boy!_

"I…I…" he stuttered.

"_Were you there_?" Charlie pressed, getting worked up again.

"Yes he was," I snapped, trying to block out the thirst. "He got badly injured too, and Carlisle fixed him up."

Charlie glowered at Jake, then looked back at me.

"How come you all healed so damn quick, then?"

"That's not something I can easily explain, dad," I replied. "Just go with me on this, okay?"

He sighed. "And Mrs. Cullen?"

"Esme… didn't make it," I said, swallowing back a wave of emotion and… guilt. "I was unconscious for a couple of days. The Cullens looked after me, and I stayed with them when I woke up… while I was recovering. It wasn't… safe for me to be with other people… just go with me on this too, okay?" I added quickly as Charlie threw me another look.

"When I woke up, it was like I could see everything properly for the first time," I continued, relieved that I was now able to speak about something that was completely true. "I realised that, although I cared for Edward, he wasn't the one I was supposed to be with. He wasn't my soul mate…"

"Been trying to tell you that for months," Jake sulked, but no one took any notice.

"I realised that my heart truly belonged to someone else… always had."

Jacob's head whipped up at that. I could tell from his face my words had stung, but I was past caring.

"I didn't think anything would come of it, but I guess… when soul mates recognise each other, then they just know."

I looked up at Carlisle, and he smiled, grasping my hand.

Charlie squeezed his gun, and tried to fight the fury that was bubbling to the surface again. I hadn't placated him exactly, but he was at least calm enough to start listening.

Carlisle took over from me then.

"I'm so sorry that you had to find out like this, Charlie. I know it doesn't make a lot of sense," he said, genuine remorse in his tone. "But what Bella says is true. I know the timing is… bad. I know that you will probably never understand it. I'm not sure I do myself. All I know is that I realised my heart belongs to Isabella, and it always will. I would do anything for her."

"I have always respected you, Cullen," Charlie sighed. "And yet now… how can I begin to respect, or understand this? Your wife dies and suddenly you love my daughter? It's not right. It's… it's pretty damn sick is what it is."

A wave of warmth washed over us all, and I knew Jasper was working hard at diffusing the situation as best he could. There was one person who wasn't getting any calmer, though… I had snuck a look at Jake, and he was positively trembling with rage.

I frowned, catching his eye, willing him to calm down. He merely stared me down, coldly.

"_Soul mate_?" he questioned suddenly, fuming. "_Always _known? Funny, I seem to remember you saying something like that about Edward. 'Don't make me choose, Jake, because it will be him. It's always been him'. Remember? Seems Isabella Swan has grown fickle in her… new _state_."

"Jacob," Jasper warned in a low, barely concealed growl. "Calm down. _Now_."

But Jacob continued to shake, fists clenching at his side.

"Don't start with me, Jake. Please. I love Carlisle. I _do_."

I turned back to Charlie, trying to ignore Jacob. Incredibly, he looked a little calmer, or perhaps it was just because anyone would look calm next to Jake right now.

"He's _seventeen_ years older than you, Bella," was all he said. I rolled my eyes. _Add three hundred and something more to that, dad._

"It doesn't matter how old he is or who he is," I exclaimed in frustration. "I love him. I'm going to be with him, always. I'm sorry, but my heart belongs to Carlisle. Nothing anyone can ever say or do will change that."

I had a sudden urge to grab Carlisle and throw my arms around his waist. I buried my head in his chest and wished the world would just go away.

A horrible growling sound ensured the world came reeling back to me at once. I snapped my head up and looked back at Jake. He was shaking uncontrollably now, his eyes fixed intently on Carlisle. He looked… feral. Fear pulsed through me, and I released Carlisle to move up a couple of the front steps, desperation in my eyes.

"No, Jake!" I cried. "Please! You can't!"

But it did no good. He lost control, and before I could even realise what was happening, he had phased, and was leaping over Charlie's head, straight for Carlisle.

And then, all hell broke loose.

_**Well, I was going to continue and make this a really long chapter, but then I decided I am evil and like to leave it on a cliffy! So, did you see that one coming? Hit the review button and let me know!**_


	16. Chapter 16

_**I am soooooo unbelievably sorry that I have taken so long to put this chapter up! My little one has been teething and starting to clamber about on all fours so have had my hands full all week and when I did have any spare time I had work to do :( But here it is at last… **_

**CHAPTER SIXTEEN**

**BPOV**

It all seemed to happen in slow motion. I could see everyone's faces turn to an expression of horror as Jake leapt forward and turned into a wolf mid-air. For a second, as he soared over Charlie's head, I wondered if we could pass this off as an attack from a wolf, and hope that Charlie didn't notice Jake was missing in all the pandemonium. He was looking at me; he hadn't actually seen Jacob phase.

I staggered back down the steps backwards as I watched Jacob soar over me too, and whirled just in time to see Carlisle growl and leap into the air to meet him.

_Okay, scrap that idea. _

There was an almighty crack as the two of them collided, and I realised that Carlisle had not had a choice in this matter. Jacob was the one creature capable of hurting a vampire, and my love had no choice but to fight back.

Charlie froze, eyes wide as Jacob and Carlisle fell to the ground with a crash that caused the ground to shake. Carlisle had Jake pinned for a second, before Jake managed to twist and thrash Carlisle under him, giant paws trying so hard to crush and claw.

"Stop! Stop it!" I screamed, breaking out of my reverie and lunging towards them. This broke the horrified trance of the others, who came rushing down the steps. I felt two strong arms flash around me, holding me back.

"Let me go!" I snarled, craning my neck to see that Jasper was the one holding me fast. "I'm in control. Please!"

I wasn't sure if he relented or not, but I broke free anyway, using every ounce of strength I possessed. Carlisle and Jacob had sprung apart, and were now circling each other in a macabre dance. Suddenly, the gravity of this hit me.

_If Jake didn't come to his senses… this could be a fight to the death. _

No sooner had the thought entered my mind, Jacob struck again, attacking Carlisle with his full force. I could no longer help myself as I watched Carlisle tumble back underneath the wolf's vast form; I let out an immensely vicious snarl and leapt on top of Jacob.

My strength was enough to wrench him off Carlisle, and we went tumbling sideways, causing the whole area to quake again. I yanked on Jacob's fur so hard I ripped some of it out, taking it with me as I hit the ground and rolled. He let out an agonised noise, and despite myself I smirked. As I did so, I caught a glimpse of Charlie, and the smirk soon vanished. He had gone white as a sheet and must have sunk to his knees at some point, because he was on the ground, watching events unfold as if in a terrible dream.

I turned to face Jacob, my eyes blazing red. Poised in a defensive crouch, ready to leap at him if necessary, I stared into his feral eyes and silently begged him to stop this madness.

He merely returned my stare somewhat sadly, before wheeling away from me and back towards Carlisle. I leapt after him, seeing that Alice, Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie were now surrounding Carlisle, each ready to attack as Jake landed squarely in front of them.

"You've broken your own goddamn rules, boy," Jasper hissed at him. "Calm down and get out of here before you get into any worse trouble with your pack. You can't defeat us all. Even if you did, you think Bella wouldn't fight you to the very end for Carlisle? Is that what you _want_? To hurt the one you love?"

Jacob whimpered softly, and I hoped for a moment… but then it turned into a low growl, and I could see the fur on his back quivering as he shook with frustration at Jasper's words. He was too far gone into his wild state to listen, I knew so in that very second. Sure enough, a snarl ripped through his throat and he crouched, bursting forward over their heads so that he landed behind Carlisle.

I snarled my own warning as I flew across the ground, watching as Carlisle whirled and crouched to face Jake. The wolf was just as quick, and they stayed stock still for a moment, facing each other.

I moved in front of Carlisle, noting the hurt that flashed through Jake's eyes.

"Stop this," I said through gritted teeth. "If you don't, then goddamn it, I will _hurt_ you, Jacob Black."

Despair ripped through me as he leapt once again, darting back to snap and bite at Carlisle, who paced around him in a circle, their eyes locked.

This dance went on for what seemed like an eternity. Jacob was driving Carlisle away from the rest of us, but we knew it mattered little, because any one of us could be on top of Jacob in a split second, no matter how far he moved Carlisle across the expanse of the Cullen grounds.

What did matter to me, however, was the sudden realisation that in doing so, Jacob had edged them both closer to Charlie. _Too close._

Jacob lunged again, Carlisle bringing his arms up to buffer the impact of the giant wolf against him and latch his beautiful hands onto the thick fur, allowing him to swing Jacob around and onto the ground.

Jake snarled and rounded on Carlisle with frightening speed, seizing his arm in his vast jaws and biting down without mercy. Carlisle's fist met the side of Jacob's head with an almighty smash, loosening the vicious grip just long enough for him to wrench himself free and roll away. He was on his feet in seconds, crouched to attack, as Jacob recovered from the blow and advanced, growling.

_Too close! _

They were inches from Charlie now. I trusted Carlisle implicitly, but Jacob was too wild, and one stray move from him could cause serious damage to a human.

A snarl burst forth from my throat, and I launched myself over their head, landing by Charlie in a heartbeat.

As I did so, I felt the tension from the others hit an all-time high.

As it turned out, my choice of action was the best thing I could possibly have done.

**CPOV**

The moment Bella leapt in front of Charlie, everything changed. Or, for want of a better description, everything stopped. Jacob's growl trailed off midway, and the great wolf's head snapped round. Lowering my defence for a second, I risked a glance at the others, and saw each of them standing stock still, frozen, afraid. Jasper was poised to leap after Bella, a look of panic on his face, and I have to confess, even I had a moment where I doubted her. _To my eternal shame._

We all thought that her control had finally folded. That she was going to attack Charlie.

_But no. _

She was defending him, from us.

I could not understand the control she had being so new to this life, but I could admire it. She astounded me, and I loved her all the more for it.

_My incredible Isabella. _

As it was, it seemed our misguided lack of faith in her was a blessing in disguise. Jacob, too, had believed Bella to be attacking Charlie, and it was, at last, enough to break through his rage and stop him in his tracks, long enough for Emmett, Jasper and Alice to gather their wits, content that Bella was not lusting for human blood, and leap between the two of us. Rosalie kept to the side, her face impassive to the situation. I had barely expected anything else, however, and was content with the knowledge that she was back safely with us.

I looked past my family at Jacob, as he slowly turned back towards me. The frenzied rage in his eyes had subsided a little, but the hatred was still there.

A howl sounded from the woods, and Jacob shook his head violently, as if trying to shake something out.

"The pack is coming," Jasper said, although we all already knew it. They materialised out of the trees moments later, growling furiously.

To my guilty pleasure, Jacob looked visibly cowed.

The wolves parted in the centre, and Sam walked out between them in human form. His barely concealed rage threatened to bubble over as he faced Jacob.

"Get back to the reservation. Now," he said, battling to keep control of his temper. Jacob shot a chilling look into my eyes, before wheeling away and disappearing into the trees with a mournful howl. None of them looked at him as he left.

The wolves melted back into the foliage, but Sam stayed for a moment, swallowing hard before looking up to meet my gaze.

The look we gave each other was mutual. We both knew what had to be done. There was no other choice.

"I am sorry for what Jacob has done," he said with a deep disappointment in his voice. Disappointment that Jacob had come so easily undone.

I nodded in acknowledgement of his apology. "It is not your fault."

He pursed his lips. "Not entirely, no."

He blamed us, in part then. Naturally.

He shot a glance at Charlie, and my eyes followed. The poor man was looking from one person to the next, utterly bewildered. Charlie was not the sort of man who wanted to know about things like this, let alone believe them.

I sighed, feeling my marble skin healing itself from the wounds Jacob had inflicted. Sam looked back to me, moving slowly back into the trees.

"I will deal with his actions, I promise you that. But I will leave you to deal with the… _consequences_ of his actions. Under the circumstances I imagine you can convey this better than I."

With that, he was gone. Another howl reverberated out of the woods, and then, there was silence.

The tension fell, and everyone breathed.

Bella was in front of me in an instant, her arms around me, and her lips pressed passionately to mine. I risked a look at Charlie over her shoulder, but he was still too shocked to care.

Everyone looked to me nervously. Except for Rosalie, who had one eyebrow quirked, as if mildly amused by it all.

"Charlie?"

Alice was crouched beside the chief, one hand on his shoulder. Jasper was looking at me, an unspoken conversation passing between us. I nodded at him, and his face turned grave. I sent him a look of reassurance, and his eyes brightened a little.

Bella moved from my arms, turning back to look at her father.

"Oh God, Carlisle, I'm so sorry. This is such a mess! What do we do now?"

I took a deep breath, and smiled down at her.

"We tell him the truth, Isabella."

Her eyes widened.

"There is little other alternative. Unfortunately we do not possess the ability to erase memories!"

"It's not that," she replied, softly. "I'm glad to be able to tell him, in a way. It's just… I don't want him to have a heart attack!"

I chuckled.

"Bella, if a rampaging werewolf and an impossibly fast, strong, supernatural man haven't already given him a heart attack, then I think I can safely assume that our history isn't going to affect him in any adverse way either."

She smiled, and I squeezed her shoulders.

Charlie stirred under Alice's touch, finally coming to his senses. His face turned from one of bewilderment to one of determined resolve.

"Would someone…" he began, voice ever so slightly shaky. "Would someone tell me what the _hell _is going on?"

Jasper and I exchanged glances again, and with a breath to steel myself, I ushered everyone inside.

_**Thank you SO much for the reviews for Chapter 15 – it got the most number of reviews so far! Can this one top 23? (Hint hint!)**_


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